Dear Cubicle Coach: Although none of my colleagues knows it,
I'm going through a divorce. I'm an emotional wreck at work, acting irritable
and sobbing in the bathroom. Should I share what's going on or keep my problems
to myself?
Dear Working Girl: Couldn't you use a little daytime support? Much goodwill can be
bought with a simple, "I'm sorry, but I've been going through some stuff lately.
It doesn't excuse my behavior, but I'm hoping you'll cut me some slack." You
don't have to share with everyone--perhaps someone you're close to, or even just
the office town crier, who'll happily disseminate on your behalf. As regards the
boss, unless you have a long-standing relationship, spare her the details and
focus on logistics: "I may need to take some personal time soon. I'm divorcing
my husband and have meetings with his scum-sucking lawyers." Be sure to explain
how your work is going to get done (ultimately her real concern), à la "Debbie's
agreed to cover for me every other Tuesday during the custody hearings."
And remember the Coach's wisdom: If you don't have baggage, it means you haven't traveled. Or, less eloquently: Everyone's got their shit.
