Me and the Entourage Boys
By Howie Kahn
I play some guitar myself, and I'm thinking I should invite Adrian over to soft-rock out next time he's in New York, but before I can, Jerry interjects: "I'll be damned if I'm gonna drive to Silver Lake and watch Adrian play the drums at 2 in the morning."
Dillon looks up from his lobster chunks: "Adrian, mouse in the bricks."
Who in the what?
"It's code," says Dillon. "It means he's got something stuck in his teeth." Adrian picks out a speck of toast.
I ask Connolly what it's like to work with so many fine women. "There's a lot of on-set crushes," he says. "We call them Set Feelings."
Dillon offers, "I'm a married man. I don't get those."
"I get 'em," says Connolly.
"Adrian's been known to get them, too."
Adrian asks to trade a piece of his turkey bacon for my bacon bacon. We swap.
"I had Club Feelings the other night," Connolly continues. Everyone at the table agrees, Club Feelings are the toughest kind of Feelings. "She was hot, and I choked. What else is new?"
"Back when I was a predator, I normally chickened out," says Jerry, who lives with his girlfriend now. "I hung up my claws."
Dillon offers me a bite of lobster. "I see you've been eyeing that!"
We hit the spa. "I'm getting my nails done," says Dillon. "Manis and pedis."
"I'm getting a pedi," says Connolly. "All my tension goes to my feet."
"He's got some weird foot fetish," says Dillon.
"I do not," says Connolly. "They hurt because I'm athletic."
"Whatever," says Dillon. Then, to one of our female attendants, "If you've got a razor, maybe you can shave his toes."
"Watch it," says Connolly.
"He's sensitive," says Adrian.
Me too! Maybe they should write me into the script.