Recap: Finally, the Final Rose on The Bachelorette

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Yes, I watched the season finale of The Bachelorette last night. OK, I watched the whole stupid season. What can I say—it's a guilty pleasure. And while I realize the show is scripted and faked and dramatized in a million ways, I have to admit that the winner, Roberto, actually seems like a nice guy. He didn't act like a wussy like the rest of the dudes, always plotting and scheming and backstabbing. Let's face it: There's nothing sexy about men who act like ninnies. And Roberto never once broke out a guitar to belt out love songs in Ali's face. (Why do people EVER think that's a good idea?) So how long do I give the happy couple? Let's just say, I give 'em longer than Vienna and Jake, with their sleaze-tastic, tabloidy, he-said/she-said breakup, complete with accusations of withholding sex, fame-mongering, cheating, and gayness. THAT is the implosion to beat.

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