If you were busy watching The Bachelor finale on Monday night, you might have missed Chelsea Handler's guest spot on Piers Morgan Live. Thank the heavens for DVR and the Internet, then, because it is awesome: Handler not only brilliantly addressed all the pressures of being the only female host in late night television, she also completely shut down the piggish Piers Morgan in the process.
"There have been so many times in the press where I have been marginalized," Handler said. "I don't want to scream and yell about everything. I don't want to be a squeaky wheel, I just want to be respected for what I do. You don't have to like me, but you have to acknowledge I'm in the landscape of late night television. That's my only issue."
"I made a big deal about the last article that Bill Carter wrote in The New York Times," she continued. "And now if I decided not to do late night any more, being the only woman in late night, it would be a problem, because then I'm leaving that space empty. So I kind of have to find someone to replace me. That's what I'm doing right now," she said, suggesting that when her contract ends in 2015 (which is sad) she'll ensure a woman takes her spot (which is awesome).
But Handler didn't just stick up for women, she stuck up for herself, too. When Morgan pressed her with "After the show, where do you go? What do you do?" and "How will you spend your life [in New York] this week, when you're not working?" in this pedantic tone, Handler was annoyed. Understandably. It was like he assumed that because she wasn't on the Chelsea Lately set, she must not be working.
"Well I have to come here and tolerate this nonsense," Handler said.
"This nonsense is designed to flaunt your tawdry book," Morgan shot back, which really just furthered Handler's point that she has her hands in a zillion different projects, not just her late night show.
And it only got more heated from there.
"You tweet very amusingly," Morgan said, at one point.
"I wish you did," Handler quipped. "I mean, in the middle of the commercial break, I want your viewers to know," she added, suggesting he ignored her and was busy on his iPhone. "You can't even pay attention for 60 seconds. You're a terrible interviewer!"
"You just weren't keeping my attention," Morgan countered.
"That's not my problem!" Handler said. "This is your show, you have to pay attention to the guest you invited on your show."
"Maybe that's why your show is ending," she added. Like a bawse.
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