Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego? Irrelevant, because all that matters is Hiddleswift and their romantic tour of the world. Ever since they sashayed their way into each other's hearts at the Met Gala, Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift have been skipping around the planet like two nomads, high on the fumes of love, Sperry Top-Siders, and British accents. The world is their oyster, and also actual oysters are their oyster, because they spend a lot of time at the beach.
So, where have Hiddleswift marked their territory thus far? Let's hold internet hands and walk in their footsteps:
1. New York City
Taylor and Tom were first spotted at the Met Gala, where she captivated him with the power of dance. It was like Billy Elliot all over again, only not at all.
2. Watch Hill, Rhode Island
Taylor and Tom were next seen together atop a rock in Watch Hill, Rhode Island—call it the paparazzi-captured kiss heard 'round the world.
3. Nashville, Tennessee
Taylor introduced Tom to her parents in Nashville, but more importantly, they went to a Selena Gomez concert where anthropologists captured this very rare footage of Hiddleswift in the wild.
4. Ipswich, Suffolk, England
Nashville was great and whatever, but the beach's siren call was just too much for Hiddleswift to resist. So, they hopped on a private jet to chill out next to some more water, and were joined by an adorably posh lady that the internet has identified as Tom's mother.
5. Rome, Italy
Hiddleswift were photographed touring the colosseum, an ancient historical structure that just wasn't prepared for this level of fame. Will it ever be the same? Who knows.
6. Watch Hill, Rhode Island take two
Tom Hiddleston joined a fleet of supermodels and gleefully flopped down a massive inflatable slide during his second vacation in Rhode Island on July 4. Pop-culture history was made.
7. Los Angeles, California
Hiddleswift briefly hit L.A. before catching a flight to Australia. They wore matching outfits, because—as The Spice Girls once said—tonight is the night, when two become one.
8. The Gold Coast, Australia
Tom and Taylor are currently in Australia, where Tom is filming Thor: Ragnarok. Upon arrival, he felt the need to go on a totally discreet and not-at-all public run, where this miraculous footage was shot:
Stay tuned for more very important updates.