1. The mansplaining is so real. I didn't know I had to pass a pop quiz (of your own making, 'cause obviously *you're* an expert with a PhD in sports) to be a fan. We'll just leave this here:
2. Why. Is. There. So. Much. Pink?? Last time I checked, my team's colors aren't Pepto with a hint of rhinestone.
3. Conversely, finding a normally-sized T-shirt (AKA fitted) in actual team colors is like finding a panda in a sea of snowmen. Also why is a women's shirt 2x the price of men's??
4. The sheer thrill of chatting about sports without any technicality questions. Because honestly, if I ask you one question about the game I'm automatically deducted like 1,000 points, and know nothing, apparently.
5. The look of shock that follows when you actually *do* know stats off the top of your head. Oh, look who doesn't know the last time they won a championship now, chump.
6. Missing out on the fantasy draft at work because everyone assumes you're not into it. Or when you want to start a draft or bracket and no one else will play with you 😩.
7. When you tell someone you're so excited for the Super Bowl and they respond that they're excited for the commercials, too.
8. When showing enthusiasm means people assume you're faking/doing it to attract men. Ah, yes, you caught me. That's been the whole plan since I was a toddler.
9. Conversely, when you tell a guy you're watching the game and he responds "that's hot"—even worse when it comes with stupid AF emojis. 🏈😍 Cool, glad to know you know what a football looks like.
10. When you're a fan of a popular team and everyone assumes you're a bandwagon fan. Or that because you love the quarterback you just started watching football, like, yesterday.
11. "Oh, was your dad a big sports fan?" -___-
12. The Icebox was your spirit animal growing up. "You can call me Becky."
13. When no one wants to watch the game with you, so you're stuck checking the score on your phone and texting your fan group. But really, why are we watching the Kardashians again...?
14. When people think you're joking after suggesting you "watch the game" as a get-together.
15. When you cheer so loudly/enthusiastically that you get a *ton* of stares. But that doesn't stop you. The new term is "dude shade."