How Every Zodiac Sign Gets Out of a Bad Date

Cough cough, I'm sick.

David Bellemere

Life is too short to deal with bad dates. Here's the perfect out for every sign, so you can head back home and still have time for that consolation Netflix and wine night. 

Aries

Directly says, "This isn't working." Pays tab. Walks out.

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Taurus

Orders the most expensive thing on the menu. Fixates on the food and then claims there's a family emergency before dessert.

Gemini

Suggests moving on to a new, more crowded location, then strikes up a conversation with new people until the date gets frustrated and leaves.

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Cancer

Clams up, mumbles one-word answers, refuses to make eye contact, then bows out with an, "I'm not feeling well."

Leo

Reroutes date to a movie theater, noisy club or live show—anything to divert from conversation and just be entertained by something else.

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Virgo

Starts probing and badgering with uncomfortably personal questions to deflect any attraction and throw the date off their trail.

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Libra

Stays for an uncomfortably long time because it's rude to end a date early, but ignores all subsequent calls from the person until they get the hint.

Scorpio

Talks emphatically about what turns them on, describing qualities that are the opposite of what the date has to offer.

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Sagittarius

Starts a political debate, lets it get heated, then has a legit excuse to storm out.

Capricorn

Pretends to get an emergency email from work, leaves abruptly—and actually goes to the office to finish a project.

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Aquarius

Begins an ideological debate about the downsides of the archaic principle of monogamy.

Pisces

Accepts a call from a dramatic friend. Stays outside "talking her down from the tree" until date decides to leave. 

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