My dad came to this country from the Philippines when he was in his 20's, so he's quite "Americanized" by now.
Like any dad, he wanted to bestow love advice upon his son, so during my earlier years he would take time to share his thoughts. Some things bombed, such as:
"Once you've dated a girl for a month or so, tell her you love her. She will appreciate it."
Even I know not to play my hand that early. But, he meant well.
He also tried to give me the following advice:
"Women and men are pretty much the same, you'll realize that as you get older-so no reason to be intimidated by women."
This was just as preposterous as his "early declaration of love" advice. I grew up with two sisters; they were kind of like guys. But most girls that I knew didn't like sports, were somewhat irrational and too emotional, and very unpredictable. They were nothing like my guy friends-they made sense.
But as I get older, I wonder if men and women are indeed very similar. I've learned this by watching my own actions. Here are some ways that I've behaved like a woman:
I've Shopped To Get Over Depression
I Like Fashion
I buy clothes because they give me confidence-and I research trends and look at what famous guys wear. I also pay attention to my hair: I've brought in a picture of a famous guy to my hairdresser before to mimic the hairdo once...or twice.
I've Gotten Emotional During A Romantic Comedy
Don't know what it is about Sleepless In Seattle, but I've actually cried over that. Pretty pathetic. But when I'm in the right emotional state, a romantic comedy can really speak to me. Most of the time, I hate them.
I've Had Random Blowups
I complain a lot about how unpredictable girls are, but sometimes I blow up at my girlfriends who make an innocent joke. I wonder if I have some estrogen that has somehow infiltrated my mind temporarily because at times I'm just cranky.
I Have "Bathroom Buddies"
I usually wait until one of my friends says they are heading to the bathroom when we are out and I take the opportunity to go with them. I like having a quiet place to "check in" with my buddies and discuss the state of the evening.
I'm A Gossip
One time my friends tested a theory by pretending that they had randomly had sex. They requested that I keep it a secret. After this, I felt like a walking time bomb. I could not keep the info inside. The jokesters said they had warned others that I'd probably be telling them the gossip, so they were able to measure how long I kept the secret before I blabbed it: 6.5 minutes.
I Write On Instant Messenger Like a Teenage Girl
My friend Justin and I like to critique things over IM, which is feminine already. But, it gets worse. One day, I was proud of our critique of someone or something, so I called a girl at work to come over and look at our handiwork. However, she could not get past the fact that Justin and I had written the following phrases throughout our IM:
...but I promise there were NO smiley faces!
Justin and I Critique Like Women
One Sunday before the NFL games started, I was watching the ESPN Sunday Countdown program. As they went around the league, they showed players disembarking the bus in different cities on their way into the stadium. One player, Terrell Owens was dressed ridiculously. I grabbed my phone and texted Justin:
"OMG, what is Terrell Owens wearing???"
"I know, totally, what the???"
Not the best public relations for our manhood.
I actually think it's nice that my friends and I have feminine qualities. I don't want to label myself as a metrosexual, but I am comfortable with myself, and what I'm saying ...even if I seem like a chick.
But, alas, my feminine qualities are only temporary, so I continue to struggle to understand women.
What sorts of "male behaviors" are unique to you? Do you find that guys are attracted to your "male" qualities, or do these qualities freak out the guys? Are you more inclined to go for a guy who shows feminine behaviors sometimes, or are you more attracted to guys who are 110% male, and show no feminine tendencies whatsoever?