I took a lot of random courses in college, but one of the most random was "Religion and the American Wilderness." This history course was based on the early settlers and their fear of the American wilderness as they pioneered into the unknown. In European folklore, the wilderness represented the unknown and was an extension of mystery, magic, and even evil (see Hansel and Gretel).
On reflection, I realize that the European stereotype of the wilderness mirrors our stereotypes of the opposite gender. In a sense, the opposite gender is the unknown, and it's mysterious.
We spend a lot of time trying to figure out what the opposite gender is thinking and doing. Stereotypes grow out of lack of understanding of a group of people.
Looking back, I realize that my "8 Ways I'm Like a Woman" post was based on stereotype. Men and women fall into the trap of stereotyping one another because they will never truly understand one another — but this mystery also keeps us intrigued.
In this post, I'm going to explore some stereotypes that women have about guys. Then, in the next post, I'll take a look at stereotypes that guys have about women.
What women think about us...
We are all out for sex.
Sadly, sometimes this is true. A lot of guys are after one thing, and they can be very transparent about that. From the time I was in middle school, the older guys talked about conquest and "getting laid" as a measurement for how much of a man I was. This belief is passed down again and again. Luckily, at some point, I figured I'd use other things to define my manhood, or I just didn't care about being a "man" in the eyes of other men.
We like to be in control.
This is an intimidating proposition for single women who are trying to find their way. Tradition states that men are the ones who ask out the women, men choose where to go for the dates during fledgling relationships, and men pay more of the time. Personally, I don't feel like I need to be in control all the time — I like to be in control of my own life, but not other people's lives. Control will always be a major issue in relationships.
We fear commitment.
I can tell you that I do fear commitment. Commitment means that I've decided that the woman I'm settling down with is perfect and there is no one else out there for me. Commitment means I've found my soul mate, that I am completely secure with myself, and that there should be no going back. I don't know about you, but all of that is pretty heavy. I think the old adage "Girls mature faster than boys" comes into play here. Commitment is a sign of maturity, and it just takes some of us longer.
We think we are good in bed.
Men are taught that confidence solves just about anything. You can be making a total mistake, but as long as you're confident, it will turn out okay. This may explain why we are so clueless at what we are doing in bed, but we act like we know. I, for one, am the first to admit to a girl that her body/mind mystify me and I am humble before them. The whole time I'm doing stuff, I'm saying to myself: "I hope she likes it..." But I have a feeling that a lot of guys are thinking: "There's no way she doesn't like what I'm doing."
If it weren't for society, we wouldn't change our underwear.
Okay, you're right. We wouldn't.
We like big boobs.
Yes, we are fascinated with them — again, because they are the unknown. We don't have them! I know plenty of guys who like big boobs; I like checking out big boobs, but I don't know many guys who have big boobs on their list of requirements for their soul mate. In fact, there are plenty of guys out there who prefer smaller boobs.
What stereotypes do you and your girlfriends have about guys? Are there any that you think are truer than others?