5 Ways That Guys Can Look Extra Sexy

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Lovelies:

After my post of last week, about female items of clothing that seem especially arousing for the mens of the species, folks on both sides of the gender aisle have been clamoring for a post about how men can present themselves in ways that are especially sexually appealing.

Before I go any further, allow me a caveat: I am something of a sexist. While I have dated a couple of men who were somewhat androgynous--in a Mick Jagger kind of way--in their dressing styles (wearing jeans that were tighter than mine, boots with little heels, etc), for the most part, I am turned on by men who find a way to exude machismo, a la the Baby Fireman.

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Anyway, without further adieu, here are:

THINGS THAT MAKE DUDES LOOK ESPECIALLY SEXY

1) Rolled-up shirt sleeves. (Good forearms required.) I don't know what it is about guys wearing dress shirts that have been folded up to the elbow, showing off their Popeye muscles, but it's quite hot. Perhaps it's because this both communicates sophistication and success--via the dress shirt--and pure masculine physicality? I don't know, it certainly works. I can remember, years and years ago, going out on a first date with a guy who, at one point, undid the buttons at his wrist, pushed up his sleeves, and then reached for my hand across the table. Bing, bing, bing! I felt myself light up like a pinball machine.

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2) A heavy classic watch. Part of the appeal, again, is that a nice wrist watch is a symbol of success. It's also pleasantly old-fashioned. (Even if the watch is brand-new, simply wearing one is a throwback to the days of yore, in this technologically-enhanced world we live in.) What's more, I think it, too, emphasizes a man's physical strength, by drawing our attention to the thickness of his wrist and the size of his hands.

3) Briefs. Boxer shorts, in my opinion, do absolutely nothing for the male form; they always look rather dumpy, kind of like over-sized diapers. But briefs show off the physique more, particularly the male tush, much more enticingly. They even encourage a little friendly spanking. Yes!

4) A good sweater. It should be nice and thick and hearty; the kind of sweater a girl could imagine putting on when she's over at your place and she gets a little cold. The more cashmere it is, the better; everybody like to touch that stuff. It should perhaps be a roll-neck or crew-neck--but I advise against V-necks. (There's something about them that says "middle-manager" to me.) In terms of color and style, I think a simple solid knit in something like black, gray or navy works well.

5) A really snazzy well-tailored suit ... with sneakers and no tie. There's something both world-wise and bad-ass about this look. It's says "Yes, I'm wearing a suit, but I'm not doing it because I think I have to--I'm doing it because I know I look totally foxy in this thing. And yes, I'm rocking the kicks, too." I think the suit should be very simple--navy or black, possibly with very fine pin-stripes--and the shirt should probably be white and very crisp. I think it's essential that the sneakers are white, or some kind of bright color (so they pop out more than black would). I recommend a pair of old-school Addidas--perhaps Rod Lavers, Stan Smiths, or simply a standard pair with black stripes. Chuck Taylors also work.

Turn-offs, for me:

1) Non-cowboys who wear cowboy boots. It's hard for me to explain this, but there's something about the pointed toes that look quite feminine. And any man who did not grow up on a cattle ranch seems like he's trying way too hard to be cool, if he wears a pair. (Here's an idea: Why not grow a pair instead?)

2) Men who carry tote bags. Please, guys: go for a messenger bag, a briefcase, or even some kind of cool knapsack. Tote bags make you look like an elderly semi-shut-in who probably smells like pee, on his way to the library to return his book on Churchill or something. It makes you look like you can barely lift your elbow, let alone pick a woman up and carry her into the bedroom.

3) Anything too University of Big State frat-boy-ish. This includes most baseball hats, any kind of jockwear, wind pants, t-shirts that promote a favorite sports team, etc, etc.

Lovelies ... what think you?

xxx

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