The Pot-Belly "Trend": It Doesn't Turn Me On

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Lovelies:

The other night, I was out with my friends Daisy Milliner and Ruby Finch, having a very mellow dinner at the brasserie Tabac in Brooklyn; and after spotting a guy sitting at the common table in the bar area who was absurdly cute, I actually I whispered, "Check him out!"

I swear, I am not usually guilty of such Sex+The City behavior. (Not that there's anything wrong with S+TC; I love it just as much as the next chick. It's just that actually behaving like Samantha in real life seems odd, doesn't it?) But, hell, I'd had half a glass of wine--which is nearly enough to make me tipsy (yes, I have the alcohol tolerance of a mosquito)--and I was feeling boisterous. Plus, Hot Stuff was halfway across the room in a bustling restaurant; he'd never notice me objectifying him.

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Besides, he really did seem especially cute: tall, with curly black hair and a face that was elfin in a good Elijah-Wood-kind of way (big eyes, a pronounced square jaw, very round cheeks). What's more, I liked his style: He was dressed in dark jeans and one of those snap-button plaid cowboy shirts. And, as he stood up to go, after shaking hands with the two male friends he was taking leave of, he grabbed a black motorcycle helmet that he'd been resting on the free stool next to him; I'm a sucker for a rugged-New-York-City-hipster-guy-on-a-bike. Then he walked past us to the door ... and I got a startlingly glimpse at his stomach.

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Apparently, Tabac serves bowling balls, because it seems he'd eaten one for dinner and was attempting to digest it.

Which is to say, he had an enormous potbelly.

After that, I wanted to go into the bathroom and wash my brain out with soap for even having the hots for the dude--that's how egregious the tummy was.

And I can't say I've ever been turned on by a man with a rotund stomach.

In August, The New York Times tried to argue that potbellies on men were actually COOL! Trendy! ... I was outraged. First of all, can you imagine an article ever being written about how cool it is that WOMEN are exhibiting excess poundage around their middles? (Right--I don't notice any pigs flying overhead either.) Second of all: Potbellies are sexy? According to whose standards?

Then I noticed that (a) the writer was himself a male--and I wouldn't be surprised if he goes around looking like he's got a bun in the oven himself. Also, that (b) the main evidence of this whooping "trend" was that he'd seen a bunch of dudes walking around the city with rounded middles. If that's all it takes for something to become trend--noticing that people happen to be doing it--may I propose the following new trends:

-taking the subway!

-eating food!

-wearing sneakers!

(Yes, the kids these days certainly are wacky. What WILL they think of next?)

Is this unfair of me--to be so judgmental about a person's physique? Am I being superficial?

Or is it perfectly reasonable for me (as someone who keeps in obsessive shape) to be turned off by a protruding tummy?

Also ... ladies ... how do

you

feel about the potbelly issue?

xxx

----------------------------------------

dear Blue: I'm so sorry to hear about what happened to your office romance! And I'm glad it sound like you've made it through all right.

and Claude: hang in there, lady, with that crush! get yourself doing some online dating or something, to take your mind off it!

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