However, even if a guy is not in the mood, he'll go with it if a woman initiates sex. When a woman initiates, it feels sexy and different. Usually, the guy feels responsible for initiating sex. While a woman will sometimes refuse sex when she's not in the mood, a guy will not initiate sex if he's not in the mood.
Here are my reasons why:
The Game's On
If a game is important enough, it might actually take our mind off sex for more than ten minutes. Men are simple creatures, and TV is awfully distracting. So many guys fantasize about having sex with a woman on top, while peering around her body, wielding a remote. Most of us are not that awesome, so we give up sex to catch the big game on TV.
Too Many External Stressors
Men and women can actually agree on this one: stress messes with libido. During tough times at work or in my personal life, I'm forced to withdraw (mentally, of course).
When my cat passed away, I didn't think about sex for a few
weeks. I didn't tell the girl I was dating though. "I can't have sex with you right now because I'm sad about my cat" doesn't seem like such a good excuse.
When I'm drunk, my libido awakens. But I'm also worried about getting it up when I'm drunk. When libido and anxiety go to battle, the anxiety sometimes wins out.
What If Someone Sees (Or Hears) Us?
As an anxious sex participant, I'm thrown off by anything out of the ordinary. I don't want someone hearing us from an adjacent apartment, or spotting our spontaneous outdoor encounter. I don't sound very fun do I?
Masturbating Too Often
Men masturbate frivolously when we are single. Now, this doesn't change when we are dating, but we do pay more attention to the frequency of masturbation sessions.
Frequent masturbation is tiring, numbs the libido, and creates performance anxiety. So, when the real thing comes along, we might shy away because we've been doing too much "work" on our own.
What do you think of my reasons, and what reasons would you add to the list? Do guys ever dodge sex when you're initiating it?