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September 10, 2011

Sign On, Turn On

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RetroRaunch.com
HOW HARD-CORE: *
COST: $21.95/month

Touted as the "thinking person's adult site," this one is basically vintage photos -- 47,000 mostly black-and-white images of tasteful nudity and sex from the past 100 years. No plastic tits -- it's erotica for real people. If porn were baseball, this would be first base.

JenMadison.com
HOW HARD-CORE: * * *
COST: $29.95/month

Jen, a 30-something wife and mother and, apparently, an exhibitionist, offers two live webcam shows a week, plus three 24/7 webcams placed around her house. Not digging Jen's dirty tricks? Write in and tell her what you'd rather watch her do -- if she can oblige, she will. A word of caution: There is footage of her balding, salt-and-pepper-hair husband going down on her. Not arousing.

Literotica.com
HOW HARD-CORE: * *
COST: Free

This site makes Nora Roberts look like Dr. Seuss. With hundreds of free erotic stories, there's something for every fetish (alien sex, anyone?). Think you can do better? Let your inner Jenna Jameson run wild and submit your own typed porn. Bonus: If you're tired of "BrickBreaker," click on free games and play "XXXMan," where a not-so-coy Ms. Pac Man type chomps up tiny penises instead of ghosts. Talk about a man-eater!


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