• Give a Gift
  • Customer Service
  • Promotions
  • Videos
  • Blogs
  • Win
  • Free Games

Living Together Left Me $26,000 in Debt

He wanted to be a pilot, so she financed his dream. But somehow their wedding never took flight.

fighting woman and man siting in dollhouse

Photo Credit: Geof Kern

Special Offer

In December of 1996, when I was 23, I met Chris online. He lived in Honolulu, where I grew up, but I had just moved to Seattle for work, so we'd talk on the phone for hours, laughing until our stomachs hurt. One night I said, casually, "I had the best clam chowder tonight. If you ever come visit, you should try it." "Amy, I work for an airline," he said. He arrived on Valentine's Day.

When he met me at the airport, I was pleasantly surprised. He was cuter than his photo, with striking green eyes, and we felt like old friends instantly. That weekend, we went to the mountains, met my brother and his wife for dinner — and had clam chowder. It was perfect.

He came back in April. In the meantime, I got a call about a PR job in Honolulu. It seemed like serendipity. Chris flew up to help me pack, we shipped my stuff on an airline discount, and I got an apartment through a friend of my mom's. He stayed that first night — and never left.

I didn't mind. Our lives fit seamlessly. He was sweet and romantic — sent flowers to my office for no good reason, brought me my favorite fast food (mahimahi from Kakaako Kitchen) when I worked late, and ate with me. We loved to cook together, too. In fact, I remember the day I knew I wanted to marry him. We had friends over for a barbecue. I laughed as Chris fumbled with the coals as he tried to set up the grill, then dripped marinade all over the patio. I could see us doing the same thing 60 years in the future.

Which is exactly what I wanted. I had a career. I was independent — I'd moved to Seattle by myself. But I'd also watched my parents — married for 42 years — grow old together. I wanted that bond, and Chris seemed to, also. Early on, we helped his best friend and his girlfriend plan their wedding. One day, as I pored over bridal magazines with her — while keeping one eye trained on gowns I liked — Chris seemed to read my mind. "You should be looking at those, too," he said. "This could be coming up for us soon."


Advertisement
Giveaway-a-day
Win a Free Chocolate Handbag!

Win a Free Chocolate Handbag!

Enter Now
Latest blog entries
  • How Men Read Women's Signals

    While discussing a breakup story with a co-worker, I learned yet another scary lesson about women for me to add to the existing volumes of scary women lessons that grace my mental bookshelves:  Women don't always mean what they say... 03/20/10

  • 4 Ways to Avoid Getting in Too Deep in a Relationship

    It's important to look ahead as you take steps in a relationship.  If you don't, you may end up painting yourself into a corner.  Let me give you an example...     My friend moved in with her boyfriend right after col... 03/20/10

  • Do We Have a "Predetermined Number of Sexual Opportunities"--to use or lose?

    With spring in the air, I bet I'm not the only one with sex on the brain. Should we avail of any opportunities we have for casual sex--since we either use them up or lose them forever--as a certain novelist suggests? (And if so, is the mindset I... 03/19/10

  • HAPPY TEXAS: More Music From SXSW 2010

    Artists that should be on your iPod before “The Madness” begins. 03/19/10

  • An Honest Guy, a Jerk, or Both?

    One could argue that it's actually better for a guy to be honest about his evil intentions.  Take, for example, my friend who gave her number to a guy thinking he was going to give her a guest bartending gig.  The next day he texted her: ... 03/19/10

  • See all blogs
Marie Claire On The Go
  • Start receiving the day's headlines from topics you choose and get the latest posts from our bloggers. Sign up for RSS feeds now.

  • Take Marie Claire with you everywhere you go. Our mobile site has the latest 'it' items of the season. Including: Blogs, Hair & Beauty, Nutrition, Health & Fitness, Horoscopes and so much more!

    Here's how:

    1. Start a mobile session on your phone
    2. type m.marieclaire.com into your browser
    3. that's it!

  • In Every Issue:
    The one-stop shop
    for the very best in
    fashion & beauty


    Give a Gift
    Customer Service
    Marie Claire Magazine
Answerology
More From Articles
wedding bands
For Better, For Worse

What would you do if your new husband was struck with a deadly, disfiguring disease? For Diane Reiners, the diagnosis was a test of love, strength, and the power of wedding vows.

condoms
Road Testing the New Condoms

If you're still stocking your goody drawer with the same old latex, it may be time for an upgrade.

woman and men with pants down
Sex Diary: Return of the Ex

Dana, 29, television producer, New York City

Special Offer