Meet Ally, Marie Claire's guest relationship blogger. She's no expert (though she's had enough experience to be one), but she tells it like it is.
A few days ago, I was at my little sister's wedding cake tasting when Donald happened.
First, let's just go on record in saying that there should be an automatic protocol that just happens when you run into an ex. You (a) look so freaking hot that he regrets ever breaking up with you, (b) have an amazing job that pays too much, and (c) are in a relationship with a painfully handsome guy standing beside you yet unable to keep his hands off you. Yep, that'll do.
What you never want is to be stuffing your face with cake samples while joking with your sister (a little too loudly) that you'll probably be celibate for the rest of your life. With frosting on your upper lip.
As for the ex in this scenario… He should be overweight, balding, and pining for you ever since you broke up six years ago. But Donald wasn't any of those things.
He looked so good (and 30 pounds thinner), in fact, that I forgot all about the oversized heart-shape cupcake I'd just shoved in my mouth and felt butterflies in my stomach.
But just as I was about to speak, his beautiful fiancée (yes, my superpower is spotting engagement rings in a mere instant) walks right up and plants a kiss on his cheek.
It was then that I realized our roles were reversed. He was the ex following the "automatic protocol" and I was the token overweight bald guy. I almost couldn't help but laugh.
Plus, his fiancée is – wait for it – a rocket scientist. I didn't even know that was an actual profession.
So I have to ask: Is it completely bad form to tell a white lie (or five) to make it seem like your life is completely amazing? Or do you just gain the confidence to speak the truth? That might not be so awkward. (Ha, right. I mean, a rocket scientist? Really?!)
If the run-in wasn't the icing on the cake (pun intended), he introduced me as an "old friend." Um, we dated for almost a year. I get guys don't want to dwell on the past right in front of their bride-to-be, but would it have been a dealbreaker to at least say we used to date?
I'm not alone in often wondering what my exes are up to now. Sure, Donald may have lost his man-boobs, but at the end of the day does that really matter? I couldn't have really missed out on that much… or did I? We all have a list, and Donald was just one of a few more I have on mine. Everyone's Mr. Right is out there somewhere, and I guess the real question is: Has he already come into my life before I was ready to know it?
Do you have a story about running into an ex? Or do you have a relationship question? Ask Ally. She's no pro, but she'll give you her brutally honest opinion. And what girl doesn't want that now and then?
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