When I was in 6th grade, a girl in my class told us that jumping up and down 50 times a day makes your boobs grow. Naturally, I jumped 100 times. Naturally, nothing happened. And even though it’s been a good decade-plus since then, and I’ve evolved mentally (and physically) past the point of wanting bigger boobs, the internet is apparently still looking for quick DIY methods to make your breasts larger. And the most recent trick? Toothpaste.
Excuse Me, What?
Yes, women are taking to YouTube to show off videos of themselves massaging toothpaste over their chests, as first spotted by Metro UK. “Tighten sagging breast in just 5 days using toothpastes no jokes [sic]” reads the title of one video, which shows a woman rubbing a cucumber, egg, and flour mixture over her chest. The view count? 7.7 million.
“What Vaseline & Toothpaste Did for my Tits!!” reads the title of another video, in which a woman details her experience—while massaging her nipples, as one does—with rubbing a concoction of toothpaste and petroleum jelly “like an idiot” over her breasts every night for 30 days. As you’d (hopefully) guess, the results were nonexistent. “Don’t be like me,” says the vlogger. “Don’t rub toothpaste on your nipples or Vaseline on your titty-balls because it will not grow your boobs.” Sage advice.
But Does It Work?
Considering toothpaste is essentially just a mix of alcohol, mint, fluoride, and detergents—i.e. ingredients that have zero abilities to grow breast tissue—there's no reason why toothpaste would work.
RELATED STORIES
But, just to make absolutely sure, I asked dermatologist Mona Gohara, M.D., assistant clinical professor at Yale University, who spends half her life telling patients not to put toothpaste where it should go. “Wait, what the hell?” was her immediate response, followed by, “As a derm, I cringe at the prospect of putting toothpaste on a zit, let alone slathering it on your breasts.” Shocking, right?
“Along with the fact that toothpaste can be an extreme skin irritant, there is also no medical evidence that toothpaste or vaseline or any topical cream can increase collagen or elastin,” she says. “Otherwise, trust me—after baby number two, I would have been wearing Crest all day long.”
Basically, please leave your poor boobs alone and let them be. Because just as your mom told you in elementary school, and just like I’m telling you right now, there’s nothing you can do to change the body you were born with.
Stay In The Know
Marie Claire email subscribers get intel on fashion and beauty trends, hot-off-the-press celebrity news, and more. Sign up here.
Except for surgery. Surgery can most definitely change things.
RELATED STORY
Chloe Metzger is the deputy beauty director at Cosmopolitan, overseeing the editorial content and growth strategy of the hair, makeup, and skin space on digital, while also obsessively writing about the best hair products for every hair type (curly girl here; whattup), and the skincare routines that really, truly work (follow her on Instagram to see behind-the-scenes pics of that magazine life). She brings nearly a decade of writing and editing expertise, and her work has appeared in Allure, Health, Fitness, Marie Claire, StyleCaster, and Parents. She also has an unhealthy adoration for Tom Hanks and would like to please meet him one day, if you could arrange that. Thanks.
-
Jess Hong Enters Her Chaotic Era
She was doing kids’ theater in New Zealand when she landed the leading role on Netflix’s epic ‘3 Body Problem.’ And now that the show is No. 1 on the streamer, her whole world is about to change.
By Jessica M. Goldstein Published
-
39 J.Crew, Reformation, and COS Items That Are Ideal for Spring Travel
Spring ready.
By Allyson Payer Published
-
Taylor Swift Breaks Yet Another Music-Industry Record
This is pretty much the norm now, no?
By Meghan De Maria Published
-
The Bar Soap Boom Is Here
Despite endless body wash options, the art of luxury soap making hasn't slipped away.
By Sophia Vilensky Published
-
The 13 Best Products for Rosacea That Fight Redness and Irritation
Flare-ups are a thing of the past.
By Samantha Holender Published
-
The 32 Best Hair Growth Shampoos of 2024, According to Experts
Rapunzel hair, coming right up.
By Gabrielle Ulubay Published
-
The 20 Best Hair Masks for Damaged Hair, According to Experts and Editors
Healthy strands, here we come!
By Gabrielle Ulubay Last updated
-
Selena Gomez Just Shared Her Entire Morning Skincare Routine on TikTok
The most giving girlie.
By Iris Goldsztajn Published
-
How Often You Should Wash Your Hair, According To Experts
Keep it fresh, my friends.
By Gabrielle Ulubay Published
-
The 11 Best Magnetic Lashes of 2023
Go ahead and kiss your messy lash glue goodbye.
By Hana Hong Published
-
Beauty Advent Calendars Make the Perfect Holiday Gift
The gift that keeps on giving.
By Julia Marzovilla Last updated