The story of Keaton Jones takes an unfortunate turn.
Captain America? More like Captain Emotion. (You're welcome.)
If there's such a thing as breakup goals, this is it.
Ouch (for us).
"It doesn't always have to be a bikini model opposite Captain America."
"I love. Try it. It's stronger than hate."
"This is beyond disgusting. I feel rage."
"I got my dream 7th grade boyfriend."
We get it, Chris! You're perfect!
Is he even real?
File under "Ellen Hijinks."
::still ships them violently::
A win in the battle for equal pay.