As the Sex and the City movie approaches, I think back to that old strategy I used to employ in college — if I take female studies classes, I’ll meet tons of girls while looking interested in feminism. Unfortunately, most guys thought like me, and we would find ourselves surrounded by dudes in those classes.
Luckily, Sex and the City presented me with my own laboratory to try to learn about women.
Here is my interpretation of what Sex and the City did:
1. Sex and the City Threw Women’s Sexuality in Our Faces
Remember when sluttiness was something that was not cool and had to be hidden? Throughout the series I saw the girls proclaim: I am slut, hear me roar. When I was younger, girls didn’t want to be perceived as sluts. My high school years were Victorian times: women had desires but had to suppress them — keep the “sinfulness” below the surface. Yeah, that’s the reason I never got laid in high school. Sex and the City turned back the clock to the Roaring '20s or women’s movement of the '70s — girls wore their hormones on their sleeves. Ultimately, I won’t comment on if this is a good or bad thing — but it is fair. For centuries men have been the ones who have been allowed to be sexual creatures. Sex and the City unapologetically said: “Hey, women love sex too!”
2. It’s True: Girls Talk Extensively About Everything
I was already somewhat aware of this, but the series confirmed it for me: My mistakes, successes, quirks, and moments I spend with a girl will be dissected with her friends. Usually this is done very quickly after the fact, while the news is still fresh — over expensive brunch. So, after a girl leaves my apartment, I’m left to lie there and go over all of the stupid things I did last night. Did I say anything ridiculous? Did my body make any strange sounds in bed? Nothing I can do about it at this point — it’s already being discussed with her friends.
3. Girls Have a Lot of Trouble Getting Along Sometimes
When girls have disagreements among one another it can be vicious. Sure, guys will come to blows or take it out on each other on the playing field sometimes, but girls get emotional and mental. It’s funny to see the girls from Sex and the City make public appearances (can anyone tell me what that thing was on Sarah Jessica Parker’s head at the London premiere?). They are all smiles on the outside. But apparently they don’t get along and barely talk in real life. I know a lot of girls who were best friends in college but now “are no longer speaking,” or “hate each another.” There is never any tangible reason for these sudden shifts. It’s a little scary.
My big take-away from my observations is that I’m very intimidated by women like the girls from Sex and the City. They are successful, independent, and wealthy. I always thought I wanted an independent woman, but this show makes me question that. While I don’t want someone who clings to me, I think I do want someone who at least needs me around for something, and — to date — I don’t think I have anything to offer women like this.
One other thing: Every guy I have ever talked to cites Charlotte as his favorite. I think it’s because she’s the least threatening. Sad, but true.
I’m wondering if women who watch this actually idolize the girls and want to be like them. Do you find the characters entertaining but deplorable, or do you wish to live a life akin to these girls? Do you agree with the lessons I’ve learned from watching the show (the FEW times I did...I swear!)
But I need to get this Sex and the City stuff out of my system, so I've got some more to say about the girls...
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