Sex Diary: I Was The Older Woman

Ali, 37, PR and marketing consultant, Philadelphia


8 p.m., home: My live-in boyfriend of two years is acting tired and crabby, so the possibility of sex tonight does not look good. He's been working as a mechanic, but his dream is to be a writer - he just can't seem to buckle down. Now he's outside fixing a car. I'm six years older than he is, and it doesn't help that I'm on a financial upswing.

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7:30 a.m., bed: Boyfriend wakes me up with kisses along my spine. It's been awhile since we've had sex. He says he hasn't been so interested lately. Sometimes I worry that because I'm older and more sexually experienced, he feels inadequate. Now he has to go to work.

6 p.m., work: Excellent day! Sold $30,000 worth of neon signs, which is more than enough to pay for our vacation next month. Pick up boyfriend's favorite dinner: cold fried chicken. There's a thunderstorm brewing - could be romantic.

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8:30 p.m., home: Boyfriend comes in and falls asleep on couch in 15 minutes, then wakes up in a funk. He's pissed at me, and I don't know why. We end up sleeping in separate rooms.

10:30 p.m., bedroom: Watch the Sex and the City episode where Miranda tries to buy Steve a suit.


8 a.m., home: Boyfriend leaves without saying anything to me.

7 p.m., home: Just got back. Boyfriend is at a friend's house working on another car. He's spending the night there . . .


6 p.m., bedroom: We're going to my mom's house tonight. Hoping to have make-up sex before we go.

8 p.m., home: Have make-up chat instead. He was just in one of his moods, he says. He has some dark times when it's best to give him space.


2 p.m., back from Mom's: Boyfriend's back hurts from driving. Then he pulls a muscle putting in a new A/C. Needless to say, no sex.


8 a.m., home: Boyfriend is basically immobile. Fun times over here at the convalescent home.


6 p.m., garden: It's a beautiful night, and my boyfriend's mood has improved considerably. Maybe it's the twinkly lights I strung up or maybe the steak I grilled, but finally, finally, finally . . . we run into the bedroom. Even though we have our ups and downs, I love him so madly.

- as told to Jessica Grose

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