Thing You Didn't Know: Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Were Separated a Year Before They Announced It

"When we said we're going to put the children first, we meant it."

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Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin have seemingly stayed #CoupleGoals without actually being a couple anymore. (How??) The 43-year-old Goop founder opened up about her family—and her split with Martin—in the new issue of U.K.'s Red magazine, where she pointed out that 1) yeah it's been hard but 2) that it's easier with a compassionate and caring partner.

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"I think that I'm very lucky in that I have such a willing partner in agreeing with, and teaching me, as much as I taught him. And bringing to me, as much as I brought to him, ideas about how to do it in a really gentle way, so it would be really gentle for Chris and myself," she said. "We loved each other very much, and we still do love each other, and we have these two beautiful children together. I thought, 'I wonder if there's a way where we don't have to do that to our kids and we can just carry on having family dinners.'"

She also gets candid about figuring out whether they'd stay together. "We had broken up a year before we announced it, so we would have this time to work through everything," she says. "It's also almost about having to press the 'override' button whenever you feel angry or jealous or whatever, broken-hearted. You have to press the button: I'm going back to the baseline of 'I love this person, he's the father of my children, he's a wonderful man. I'm just going to put my sh*t aside for right now.' It really has not been easy for me at times; I'm sure it's not been easy for him."

"It really has not been easy for me at times; I'm sure it's not been easy for him."

In the end, as we all know, they agreed that breaking up conscious uncoupling was for the best—and the best way to handle things for their children, Apple, age 11, and Moses, age 10. "When we said we're going to put the children first, we meant it. If you want to put your children first then why are you slagging your husband off in front of them?  I have to say it wasn't the outcome we were hoping for, but it was our outcome and we've really done the best that we can."

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I'm Sam, the senior editor at I love shining a light on awesome people doing things that matter, cool products and hacks for everyday life, and advice you'll actually use. I'm pretty much always looking for the perfect GIF for any situation. When I'm not trolling the internet, I can be found dancing like a weirdo or napping like it's my job. Right now, I'm probably eating or drinking something filled with sugar or booze. (Sorry, mom.)