• Give a Gift
  • Customer Service
  • Promotions
  • Videos
  • Blogs
  • Win
  • Games

Can Bad Sex Be Improved?

Posted in:

Can Bad Sex Be Improved?

Share

I recently a read a Q&A in which a woman describes struggling with dating a "nice guy." Everything is going well until they have sex — it's bad. I thought it was a shame that a relationship that seemed to be heading in the right direction could be derailed by problems in the bedroom. I'm not going to argue that sex can't destroy a relationship, but I think, sometimes, bad sex can get better.

Couples can overcome physical challenges. In the beginning, it's tough to know what your partner enjoys. So, being "off rhythm," touching the wrong spots, trying the wrong , or being a poor kisser can be fixed. Physically, you can coach each other on your likes and dislikes. After a while, you'll know what to do, and how long to do it. With work, communication, and honesty, bad sex based on physical issues can be improved.

But if it's a mental disconnect that's making sex unsatisfying, it's tougher to fix. A friend of mine once told me that sex with her boyfriend was so boring, she used to count the tiles in his bedroom ceiling during the act. For a good mental sexual connection, there needs to be some lust involved. In a long-term relationship, lust is rooted in the chemistry you share with your partner. It has to occur naturally — it can't be taught or intensified through conversation. Just like any other activity, sex won't be amazing every time. You're both have off days. So, don't jump to conclusions after a few bad encounters.

Finally, there is a spiritual connection that can happen during sex. This type of connection, or lack or connection, is tough to change or improve. There are many reasons that one may not be satisfied spiritually during sex. It all has to do with that person's core beliefs. A man who is gay, but hasn't been with another man yet, will not spiritually enjoy sex with women. People who have monogamous sex when they secretly long for multiple partners will not be spiritually satisfied. Conversely, people who are having casual sex, when they actually want a long term relationship, will feel empty. Satisfying your spiritual side sexually requires knowing what you want and working to fulfill that desire.

In my opinion, only one type of sexual "issue" can be fixed. If you're mentally or spiritually unsatisfied, you might have to think about whether you're with the right person.

Do you agree with my point of view? What are your thoughts? Can bad sex be improved more often than not? 

Share
Connect with Marie Claire:
Advertisement
horoscopes
daily giveaway
One winner will receive year's supply of makeup products from Dior and a year's supply of hair products from Tresemmé as selected by the Sponsor. A total prize package of 485!

One winner will receive year's supply of makeup products from Dior and a year's supply of hair products from Tresemmé as selected by the Sponsor. A total prize package of 485!

enter now
You Know You Want More
Special Offer
Link Your Marie Claire Account to Facebook
Welcome!

Marie Claire already has an account with this email address. Link your account to use Facebook to sign in to Marie Claire. To insure we protect your account, please fill in your password below.

Forgot Password?

Thanks for Joining

Your information has been saved and an account has been created for you giving you full access to everything marieclaire.com and Hearst Digital Media Network have to offer. To change your username and/or password or complete your profile, click here.

Continue
Your accounts are now linked

You now have full access to everything Marie Claire and Hearst Digital Media Network have to offer. To change your settings or profile, click here.

Continue