• Give a Gift
  • Customer Service
  • Promotions
  • Videos
  • Blogs
  • Win
  • Games

When It Comes to Dating, Are You Too Nice?

Posted in:

When It Comes to Dating, Are You Too Nice?

Share

It's hard to tell when a guy is crazy, doesn't have game, or just thinks he's too good to be rejected. Obviously, you want to steer clear of these types, but you don't want to lose your chances of something if you misread a guy. If you cut him off too soon, you might ruin what could have been a good thing.

A friend of mine went out with a guy a few times and her only initial complaint was that he was "a little over enthusiastic with his texting." The dating fizzled out eventually, but he kept texting her as if they were best buddies.

These texts were small talk texts like:

"hows you're day going?"

"what's up?"

"guess where I am right now."

My friend continued to be nice answering back, but I warned her that she had to stop answering him. What's the point if you're not into him? Being friendly can only lead to no good in my opinion. It's not like they were good friends and answering each other was a requirement.

His constant texting became the subject of our jokes eventually. It was kind of sad how he couldn't get a clue that she didn't want to hear from him. Then again, she kept answering his texts.

Things came to a head one night when the two of them were out at the same venue. They were drunk in the street and the guy pretty much grabbed her and tried to kiss her. She screamed, pried him off of her and left the scene.

A few days later, she got a text from the guy: "wow sorry for what I did, I was wasted."

No excuse. My friend agreed with me and she finally texted him back asking him never to text her again and to leave her alone.

This guy is obviously to blame for this mess. His actions showed that he had no game, and he was kind of crazy on top of that. Also, it seems that he couldn't believe that this girl wasn't interested in him — why else would he keep bothering her and ultimately grab her in the street.

The sad thing about the story is that this girl is very sweet, and her friend told me that's why she kept talking to the guy: "she's too nice to ignore him or tell him to go away."

I wonder where all the "nice" girls are when I'm getting ignored after I so much as ask a girl out once, and they look at me like I have three heads or ignore me. Meanwhile, guys like this keep pushing and getting answers and attention.

It's not her fault that he behaved this way, but the sad thing about dating is that you can be too nice. At some point you have to just put your foot down and tell someone to get lost.  Usually, you should do this at the point where you're complaining about something he does, or he seems weird. You should never be too trusting, and there's no reason to keep someone around just to be nice.

Chances are, most guys are either crazy, have no game, or think they are too good to be rejected.

Do you have trouble being "mean" to a guy you're not interested in? Have you ever gotten burned in some way because you were too nice? When do you think my friend should have cut off communications with the guy in this situation?

Follow me on Twitter: twitter.com/richravens

Share
Connect with Marie Claire:
Advertisement
horoscopes
daily giveaway
One winner will receive a year’s supply of makeup products from Lancôme ($389) and a year’s supply of hair products from Garnier Fructis ($90), as selected by the Sponsors.

One winner will receive a year’s supply of makeup products from Lancôme ($389) and a year’s supply of hair products from Garnier Fructis ($90), as selected by the Sponsors.

enter now
You Know You Want More
Special Offer
Link Your Marie Claire Account to Facebook
Welcome!

Marie Claire already has an account with this email address. Link your account to use Facebook to sign in to Marie Claire. To insure we protect your account, please fill in your password below.

Forgot Password?

Thanks for Joining

Your information has been saved and an account has been created for you giving you full access to everything marieclaire.com and Hearst Digital Media Network have to offer. To change your username and/or password or complete your profile, click here.

Continue
Your accounts are now linked

You now have full access to everything Marie Claire and Hearst Digital Media Network have to offer. To change your settings or profile, click here.

Continue