Fergie Admits She Was "Hallucinating on a Daily Basis" During Her Drug Addiction

"It was a hell of a lot of fun...until it wasn’t."

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Fergie has evolved *a lot* over the years. The 42-year-old just released her second albumDouble Dutchess (her first in 11 years), and recently went through a heartbreaking divorce with her husband of eight years, Josh Duhamel. In the wake of all these changes, Fergie recently opened up in an interview with British publication iNews about another significant event in her past life: dealing with a crystal meth addiction.

"At my lowest point, I was suffering from chemically induced psychosis and dementia. I was hallucinating on a daily basis," she recalls. "It took a year after getting off that drug for the chemicals in my brain to settle so that I stopped seeing things. I’d just be sitting there, seeing a random bee or bunny."


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She continues, “I remember thinking: ‘If I walk outside, and the SWAT team’s out there, I was right all along. But if they’re not out there, then it’s the drugs making me see things and I’m going to end up in an institution. And if it really is the drugs, I don’t want to live my life like this any more, anyway.’ I walked out of the church; obviously there was no SWAT team, it was just me in a parking lot. It was a freeing moment."

This isn't the first time Fergie has opened up about her drug use. Over a decade ago, the singer told Time that her addiction “was the hardest boyfriend I ever had to break up with.” She continues to allude to these hallucinations in her visual album, Double Dutchess, and sees the low-point as a learning experience.

“The drugs thing, it was a hell of a lot of fun…until it wasn’t. But you know what, I thank the day it happened to me. Because that’s my strength, my faith, my hope for something better.” 👏

Rachel Epstein

Rachel Epstein is a writer, editor, and content strategist based in New York City. Most recently, she was the Managing Editor at Coveteur, where she oversaw the site’s day-to-day editorial operations. Previously, she was an editor at Marie Claire, where she wrote and edited culture, politics, and lifestyle stories ranging from op-eds to profiles to ambitious packages. She also launched and managed the site’s virtual book club, #ReadWithMC. Offline, she’s likely watching a Heat game or finding a new coffee shop.