By Rich Santos
My dad came to this country from the Philippines when he was in his 20's, so he's quite "Americanized" by now.
Like any dad, he wanted to bestow love advice upon his son, so during my earlier years he would take time to share his thoughts. Some things bombed, such as:
"Once you've dated a girl for a month or so, tell her you love her. She will appreciate it."
Even I know not to play my hand that early. But, he meant well.
He also tried to give me the following advice:
"Women and men are pretty much the same, you'll realize that as you get older-so no reason to be intimidated by women."
This was just as preposterous as his "early declaration of love" advice. I grew up with two sisters; they were kind of like guys. But most girls that I knew didn't like sports, were somewhat irrational and too emotional, and very unpredictable. They were nothing like my guy friends-they made sense.
But as I get older, I wonder if men and women are indeed very similar. I've learned this by watching my own actions. Here are some ways that I've behaved like a woman:
I've Shopped To Get Over Depression
Not only did shopping take my mind off of what was bothering me, but the new clothes I bought made me feel better about myself. This leads me to my next point...
I Like Fashion
I buy clothes because they give me confidence-and I research trends and look at what famous guys wear. I also pay attention to my hair: I've brought in a picture of a famous guy to my hairdresser before to mimic the hairdo once...or twice.
I've Gotten Emotional During A Romantic Comedy
Don't know what it is about Sleepless In Seattle, but I've actually cried over that. Pretty pathetic. But when I'm in the right emotional state, a romantic comedy can really speak to me. Most of the time, I hate them.
I've Had Random Blowups
I complain a lot about how unpredictable girls are, but sometimes I blow up at my girlfriends who make an innocent joke. I wonder if I have some estrogen that has somehow infiltrated my mind temporarily because at times I'm just cranky.
I Have "Bathroom Buddies"
I usually wait until one of my friends says they are heading to the bathroom when we are out and I take the opportunity to go with them. I like having a quiet place to "check in" with my buddies and discuss the state of the evening.
I'm A Gossip
One time my friends tested a theory by pretending that they had randomly had sex. They requested that I keep it a secret. After this, I felt like a walking time bomb. I could not keep the info inside. The jokesters said they had warned others that I'd probably be telling them the gossip, so they were able to measure how long I kept the secret before I blabbed it: 6.5 minutes.
I Write On Instant Messenger Like a Teenage Girl
My friend Justin and I like to critique things over IM, which is feminine already. But, it gets worse. One day, I was proud of our critique of someone or something, so I called a girl at work to come over and look at our handiwork. However, she could not get past the fact that Justin and I had written the following phrases throughout our IM:
...but I promise there were NO smiley faces!
Justin and I Critique Like Women
One Sunday before the NFL games started, I was watching the ESPN Sunday Countdown program. As they went around the league, they showed players disembarking the bus in different cities on their way into the stadium. One player, Terrell Owens was dressed ridiculously. I grabbed my phone and texted Justin:
"OMG, what is Terrell Owens wearing???"
"I know, totally, what the???"
Not the best public relations for our manhood.
I actually think it's nice that my friends and I have feminine qualities. I don't want to label myself as a metrosexual, but I am comfortable with myself, and what I'm saying ...even if I seem like a chick.
But, alas, my feminine qualities are only temporary, so I continue to struggle to understand women.
What sorts of "male behaviors" are unique to you? Do you find that guys are attracted to your "male" qualities, or do these qualities freak out the guys? Are you more inclined to go for a guy who shows feminine behaviors sometimes, or are you more attracted to guys who are 110% male, and show no feminine tendencies whatsoever?
Nordstrom's Cyber Monday 2021 Sale: Our Picks
One of the biggest sales of the year has begun!
By The Editors •
The Iconic Le Creuset Dutch Oven Is On Major Sale
It's so pretty!
By Julia Marzovilla •
The 70 Best Gifts for Dogs, Dog Owners, and Dog Lovers In 2021
You're not a regular dog mom, you're a cool dog mom.
By Jenny Hollander •
The 17 Best Sex Games to Spice Up Date Night With
Game night, but make it hot.
By The Editors •
The 56 Most Popular Vibrators, Reviewed by Experts
The most trusted source in feelin' yourself.
By Alanna Greco •
COVID Forced My Polyamorous Marriage to Become Monogamous
For Melanie LaForce, pandemic-induced social distancing guidelines meant she could no longer see men outside of her marriage. But monogamy didn't just change her relationship with her husband—it changed her relationship with herself.
By Melanie LaForce •
Four Flirting Fun Facts--With Research to Back Them Up!
My pal Judy Dutton just wrote an excellent new book: How We Do It: How the Science of Sex Can Make You a Better Lover. She's chatted with me about the psychological studies that show how best to flirt; what kind of pick-up lines work best; and what you're really saying with your body language.
By Maura Kelly •
100 Sex Songs That Won't Make You Cringe
Dim the lights and hit play on this sex songs — the perfect playlist of songs to have sex to.
By The Editors •
75 Movie Sex Scenes That Are 100 Percent Real
These actors aren't faking anything.
By Mehera Bonner •
33 Unexpected Valentine's Day 2021 Date Ideas
A.k.a. not dinner and roses.
By The Editors •
Cult Status Satisfyer Vibrators Are Under $40 for Prime Day
4 stars, 16k reviews...yeah, this vibe's got a massive fan club (for good reason).
By Carina Hsieh •