My Long Distance Backup Plan
There are an estimated 7 million long distance couples in America-14 million people with their own lives in their own cities, but with partners living a flight (or drive or train ride) away. It's a great setup for commitment phobes, workaholics, and
In my early 20s, after taking a cool job in New York, I started dating a guy in Annapolis, and though I had never spent more than a week at a time with him, I dreamed of absconding to his split level ranch on a grassy, tree lined acre. Why not? I'd always considered my life in the city to be a kind of prison sentence: I would get my career established and be out in five years, three on good behavior. And while I considered myself an independent woman, a part of me wanted the boyfriend to spring me early, the two of us raising a family there among the boats and the trees and those colorful colonial row houses. He had a home! With a yard! I had a bad roommate situation and work.
And with little local personal life-no one to rush home to, no one to feel guilty about neglecting, and no desire to expose myself to the temptations of city nightlife-I threw myself into the job, working each night until 9 or 10. Then I started to get great assignments simply because I was around, and I started to, as one review said, "exceed expectations in all categories."
So when, two years in, the boyfriend started talking about marriage, I passed it up and took a promotion instead. I didn't really notice it happening, but I'd fallen in love with another-my work-and I decided to commit. Our relationship has had its ups and downs, but we've eased into a good routine, and we're still going strong. We celebrated 10 years in September.
Stay In The Know
Marie Claire email subscribers get intel on fashion and beauty trends, hot-off-the-press celebrity news, and more. Sign up here.
-
Zendaya Delivers a Podium-Worthy Pre-Olympics Gown
She's shining brighter than the City of Lights.
By Halie LeSavage Published
-
'Love Island USA' Star Kenny Rodriguez Is Not "Playing Around" with His and JaNa Craig's Romance Outside of the Villa
The prince and princess of season 6 have remained the cutest couple since filming wrapped.
By Quinci LeGardye Published
-
So Many Celebrity Beauty Favorites Are in Nordstrom's Anniversary Sale
Shop Jennifer Lopez, Meghan Markle, and Kaia Gerber's beloved picks.
By Julia Marzovilla Published
-
The All-Time Favorite Sex Positions of 11 Real Women
"It makes me feel like the sexiest woman on earth."
By The Editors Published
-
The 22 Best Vibrators, According to Sex Toy Experts
The vibes are immaculate.
By Gabrielle Ulubay Last updated
-
The 20 Best Sex Games for Couples in 2023
Who said game nights need to be wholesome?
By Gabrielle Ulubay Last updated
-
The 14 Best Lubes for Every Need
Good sex should always go smoothly.
By Gabrielle Ulubay Last updated
-
COVID Forced My Polyamorous Marriage to Become Monogamous
For Melanie LaForce, pandemic-induced social distancing guidelines meant she could no longer see men outside of her marriage. But monogamy didn't just change her relationship with her husband—it changed her relationship with herself.
By Melanie LaForce Published
-
100 Sex Songs That Won't Make You Cringe
Dim the lights and hit play on this sex songs — the perfect playlist of songs to have sex to.
By The Editors Published
-
33 Unexpected Valentine's Day 2023 Date Ideas
A.k.a. not dinner and roses.
By The Editors Published
-
How to Stay Safe Using Dating Apps and Websites
Did you know your favorite dating apps may be selling your intimate information? Swipe right on privacy with these key safety tips.
By Jenny Hollander Published