The Ultimate Pick Up Line

(Image credit: Rich Santos)

The closest thing I have to a pickup line is, "I like your outfit."

But what if there was a line out there ... a line that cut the conversation out ... a line that got right to the point without being as obnoxious as "Wanna fuck?"

That line, my friends, was taught to me by my coworker Briana just a few weeks ago. Now keep in mind that the testing ground for this line was the Midwest. We have not tested it anywhere else to date.

Briana recounted the story in amazement. She was out with her boyfriend and his brother. They were waiting in a long line to get into a bar. Then they witnessed a guy walk up to a girl and say: "Hey, this place sucks. Wanna get outta here?"

The girl didn't miss a beat. "Sure." And they took off into the night.

Briana assumed that the guy was in the driver's seat at this point. He could take her back to his place or a bar — wherever his little heart desired.

Later on that night Briana urged her boyfriend's brother to try the line. He walked over to a girl waiting for a drink at the bar and said, "This place sucks, wanna get outta here?" This time the girl put up slight resistance: "Well, I never do this ... but okay."

He then took her home.

One hundred percent success is rare in the pickup-line world. But as I analyzed this line I realized it might just work for a number of reasons:

1. Confidence: Of course, girls are attracted to confidence. Walking up brazenly and asking a girl to get out the place is direct. It's something only a guy who is completely confident in the outcome would try.

2. "I'm Too Cool for School": There's a fine line between the sourpuss who thinks everything is boring and the person who knows there's something better out there, and is willing to let you come along.

3. The Stun Gun: It's true, when we are presented with situations we are not used to, we don't know how to respond.