Pets. What did we do to deserve them? Even though some of them are assholes? Why do Taylor Swift's cats sit upright like human toddlers? Since we've already scrutinized other aspects of the American Famous Person—their voices (opens in new tab), their body language around their alleged significant others (opens in new tab)—why not train the magnifying glass on their domesticated animals?
With pet expert Alyona DelaCoeur of Why Does My Dog (opens in new tab) on deck, we examine the deeper meaning behind five of the world's luckiest occupants on four legs/15 tentacles—from the aforementioned felines to a rabbit named Bruce.
"Beast is a Puli, a Hungarian herding dog. They are known for being one of the friendliest dog breeds and for being extremely intelligent. They can be a little wary of strangers but are not usually aggressive. A good match for a Puli breed would be a more outgoing person who likes to make friends (Facebook, anyone?) and is intelligent enough to challenge the dog mentally. They do require a lot of time and specific care, so a good owner should be very detail-oriented and determined."
"There is a huge misconception that bunnies just like to sit in their cages, eating and doing nothing all day. However, what many people don't know is that bunnies are really extremely active—they need to run, jump, and play. They are trainable (can learn to use a litter box) and have amazing memory. As an owner, you have to be very creative to keep your bunny active. At the same time, they do need downtime. In the wild, bunnies live in an extremely chaotic environment and need to be on their guard to survive. A bunny owner thrives in chaos (or perhaps a very outgoing TV family)."
"A study done by the University of Texas (opens in new tab) found that cat owners are creative, adventurous, and more open than dog owners. The study also found that cat owners can be very sensitive, which makes sense given how Taylor Swift became popular by writing her own songs (and music) about her feelings and/or personal experiences."
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"Dog owners tend to be very extroverted, energetic, and likeable, all characteristics we would expect from supermodel and actress Cara Delevingne, who is known for her personality. Leo is an adorable husky crossbreed, which tend to be less neurotic, healthier, and less needy than pure- bred dogs. Owning a mixed breed shows that the person is open-minded, carefree, and considerate."
"Jellyfish are quite a conversation starter. They're very entertaining to watch, so it makes sense that a jellyfish owner would be all about entertainment. No surprise since they've starred in everything from The Hills and Big Brother to Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars."
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Chelsea Peng is a writer and editor who was formerly the assistant editor at MarieClaire.com. She's also worked for The Strategist and Refinery29, and is a graduate of Northwestern University. On her tombstone, she would like a GIF of herself that's better than the one that already exists on the Internet and a free fro-yo machine. Besides frozen dairy products, she's into pirates, carbs, Balzac, and snacking so hard she has to go lie down.
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