My First Impression Pointers
I've been on one of those rolls lately that guys get on, but they don't want to jinx it by examining it. Of course, I'll examine it today and jinx it. I've been meeting a lot of attractive girls and maintaining contact after the...
I've been on one of those little rolls lately that guys get on, but they don't want to jinx it by examining it. Of course, I'll examine it today and jinx it.
I've been meeting a lot of attractive girls and maintaining contact after the initial meeting. I find this to be more of a measure of success than "getting laid," because it leaves open the opportunity for something that could be much more fulfilling.
They say that first impressions are everything, so my theory for my lucky streak is that I'm making good first impressions.
You get one chance to make a first impression (opens in new tab). Here are the things that have helped me or hindered me in the quest to make a good impression on a girl:
Good:
1. Lots of Laughter
When I'm out the number one thing I'm trying to do with acquaintances and friends is laugh and enjoy myself. If I ever find that I'm in a bad mood, I'll head home so I don't dampen my surroundings. Introducing someone to my sense of humor is paramount.
2. Cool Friends
We all think our friends are cool, but I have a great group of friends (opens in new tab)who don't get into fights or make anyone else around them feel uncomfortable. Sure, we can be obnoxious at times, but it's more about goofiness than malice.
3. Good Convo
When I'm on, I get into music, pride for my college and hometown, and apply my rules of looking smart: sprinkle conversation with lots of interesting facts, but don't be an expert in just one thing.
4. Luck
Making an approach has to do with circumstance. Sometimes things just have to break right for me to get a chance to meet a girl while out (opens in new tab). I may end up next to a cute girl at the bar, I might literally stumble into her crowd on the dance floor, or maybe I meet a girl's friend first and subsequently infiltrate the group.
Bad:
1. Sheer Drunkenness
If I'm too wasted, I'm a cartoon character so I can't be taken seriously. Furthermore, a girl may wonder if I'm serious about asking for a date if I ask her for her number.
2. Cat Hair On Clothes (opens in new tab)
It will be an amazing day when I can leave my apartment without a single cat hair on my person.
3. Get A Manicure!
I chew my nails really badly and this habit freaks out and disgusts some girls. It's so bad sometimes it looks border masochistic.
4. Playing My Hand
Sometimes I'm so captivated, I blurt out: "you're super cute," or even worse: "you're hot". Gotta learn to temper that excitement.
5. Psycho Loner
This is the opposite of "cool friends". It occurs when I've gotten so drunk that I'm in another dimension, curled up in a booth just needing to be in bed. Or, I become separated from the pack and show up randomly by myself, leaving girls to wonder how this sick and weak member of the herd will ever find its way.
6. Wrong Dinner (opens in new tab)
I love Thai food and other spicy, garlic-saturated delicacies. No amount of brushing or Listerine (which feels like it's burning holes through my mouth) can get down deep enough. The garlic seeps through my pores or from deep within my breath. Never good, especially in loud bars where you're leaning in to hear one another.
7. Attention Deficit Disorder
Sometimes I'm looking right at a girl's face while she's talking and all I see is a mouth moving and emitting white noise. So after a girl tells me that she's getting evicted and has to move out in two weeks, and I reply: "NICE!," and the damage is done. I'm also prone to scanning the room because I'm easily distracted. Never a good tactic when you're talking to someone you're interested in.
The great first impression is a perfect storm combining all of the "good" aspects. Just one of the "bad" aspects mixed in can ruin it.
What things make up a good or bad impression for you when you meet a guy for the first time? Have you ever ignored a bad first impression to give him another shot? One danger is a loser guy who puts up a good front in the beginning. So, has a good impression ever gone totally sour after a few more times out?
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