We've all heard of deal breakers. But the other day I was wondering if the opposite existed: The Deal Sealer. Do we sometimes go for someone because of a little perk?
Ifsomeone is nice, funny, or intelligent, (opens in new tab)it can't be considered a deal sealer. It has to be something outside of personality. The classic Deal Sealer is money. It's a superficial perk, but sometimes it is enough for us to be attracted to someone.
With a deal Deal Sealer, we convince ourselves that this person will become nice, smart or funny with time...or we are really pulling for them to do so.
Is it possible to have that person grow on you beyond the appeal of their Deal Sealer perk? The vast majority of relationships based on a Deal Sealer will fizzle out. A fun perk can only last so long. Eventually, there needs to be some substance.
Here are some Deal Sealers I've seen:
Sports Related
One day I attended a Ravens tailgate with some friends at a house right next to Ravens stadium. (opens in new tab) As the smoke from the grill rose gracefully into the sky, against the towering stands of the buzzing stadium, I asked myself: "what girl (goddess) lives here?" I did some research, and started dating this girl. The entire relationship existed because I wanted to go to her house for tailgates near the stadium. After football season ended, however, the relationship could only survive a few more months.
Position of Power
The classic Position of Power perk is the bar tender. Bar tenders get so many women. The girls bring their friends in, flaunting the fact that they are getting free drinks and that they are the one the bar tender is going to leave with at the end of the night.
Accents
If a platypus, native to Australia, could speak it would have a chance to woo a woman despite its weird appearance. Well, platypi (platypusses?) are cute, I admit. But women swoon over Australian accents, British accents, or any fun accent. OK, I admit I do too.
Artistic Skill
If our platypus can wield a guitar or paint a beautiful picture, it could seal the deal. My friend dated a guy based on the fact that he was a painter. She constantly implored him to paint a portrait of her. He finally did. After that, the mystery wore off: they broke up, because she thought she looked really ugly in his painting.
A Cool Ex-Boyfriend Resume
Let's face it: if a girl cheated on me with Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin, or Tom Brady, I'd be flattered to be in their stratosphere somehow. Nothing I could do about it. It's no different than ancient Greece when Zeus used to swoop down and take a maiden. Hey, I don't mind being
in the league of a god. Back to real life... if a girl who has dated a really cool guy is interested in me, I'd definitely consider her. If those cool guys went for her then maybe I can be as cool as they are by dating her.
Amazing Style
A guy might explain why he found a woman attractive the following way: "those boots with that skirt was such a hot look." A memorable, impactful style can definitely seal the deal. (opens in new tab) I just feel cool in a stylish girl's presence.
Great Body
Yes, it's a shameful fact, but almost every guy I know will go for a girl with a great body even if her face is not beautiful. We call these girls "butter-faces," as in "her body was great, but her face..." So there's some guy slang for you-and I don't know any guy who would not consider a Butter-face.
A Nice Apartment
It's not easy to afford nice places in this city, (opens in new tab) so if a girl has a great place (and this would require a huge HD flat screen TV) I might be willing to give it a shot with her. If her place, in addition to this TV, had a nice couch and big kitchen I could definitely get used to it. If it had instant boiling water, a dishwasher, laundry, a stainless steel Viking stove, and those ice makers that make the square cubes, I'd marry her.
Have you ever dated or had a guy ask you out because of a Deal Sealer? Do you agree with the ones I mentioned, and what Deal Sealers have you seen or been attracted to? Do you think a fulfilling relationship could ever developed if it started based on a Deal Sealer?
Follow me on Twitter: www.twitter.com/richravens (opens in new tab)
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