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    1. Culture

    The 30 Most Absurd Song Lyrics Ever

    These are real songs, people.

    By Marie Claire
    Published 21 February 2014 In News

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    The 30 Most Absurd Song Lyrics Ever
    (Image credit: Marie Claire)
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    1. "I hopped of the plane at LAX with a dream and my cardigan" — Party in the USA, Miley Cyrus

    2. "Do you ever feel like a plastic bag, drifting through the wind." — Firework, Katy Perry

    3. "I'm a Barbie girl, in the Barbie world. Life in plastic, it's fantastic!" Barbie Girl, Aqua

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    4. "He was a boy, she was a girl, can I make it any more obvious" — Sk8ter Boi, Avril Levingne

    5. "You reverse, you reverse, and I pregnated your mouth, girl, ooooh" — Drunk in Love Remix, Kanye West

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    6. "Blinded by the light / Revved up like a deuce / Another runner in the night" — Blinded by the Light, Manfred Mann

    7. "Email my heart and say our love will never die" — Email My Heart, Britney Spears

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    8. "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Saturday to Sunday." — I Gotta Feeling, Black Eyed Peas

    9. "So what's it gonna be? Are you real to me? Or are you non-dairy creamer?" — Non Dairy Creamer, Third Eye Blind

    10. "I kick plenty of ass, so call me an astronaut." — Keep Their Headz Ringin, Dr. Dre

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    11. "What the hell is on Joey's head?" — Photograph, Nickelback

    12. "And I know you love Shrek because we've watched it 12 times." — Wake Me Up, Ed Sheeran

    13. "I'm trying to find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful. DAMN, you'se a sexy bitch!" — Sexy Bitch, David Guetta

    14. "Tomorrow is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards" — Friday, Rebecca Black

    15. "It feels like a perfect night to dress up like hipsters" — 22, Taylor Swift

    16. "New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits/Chinese food makes me sick" — Summer Girl, LFO

    17. "I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror." — I'm Yours, Jason Mraz

    18. "With him I'm never losin'. And he knows that my name is not Susan. Oh, what a man! — Whatta Man, Salt-N-Pepa

    19. "If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends" — Wannabe, Spice Girls

    20. "My sticky paws were in to making straws out of big fat slurpy treats" — Steal My Sunshine, Len

    21. "New Kids on the Block had a bunch of hits / Chinese food makes me sick." — Summer Girl, LFO

    22. "I don't like cities / But I like New York / Other places make me feel like a dork" — I Love New York, Madonna

    23. "If the light is off then it isn't on." — So Yesterday, Hilary Duff

    24. "You sure can dress me up in diamonds / You sure can dress me up in dirt" — La La, Ashlee Simpson

    25. "I cried the whole time (Doesn't matter, had sex) / I think she might've been a racist (Doesn't matter, had sex) / She put a bag on my head (Still counts) / I just had sex" — I Just Had Sex, Lonely Island featuring Akon

    26. "Am I original? (Yeah) / Am I the only one? (Yeah) / Am I sexual? (Yeah)" — Everybody, Backstreet Boys

    27. "Wake up in the morning feeling like P. Diddy." — Tik Tok, Ke$ha

    28. "B*tches suck my d*ck because I look like J.K. Rowling." — Wonton Soup, Lil B

    29. "The square root of 69 is 8 something right?, cause I've been trying to work it out" — What's my name, Rihanna featuring Drake

    30. "Are we human? Or are we dancer?" — Human, The Killers

    Marie Claire

    Dedicated to women of power, purpose, and style, Marie Claire is committed to celebrating the richness and scope of women's lives. Reaching millions of women every month, Marie Claire is an internationally recognized destination for celebrity news, fashion trends, beauty recommendations, and renowned investigative packages.

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