Does Love Conqure All?

At one time the Roman Empire stretched through most of Europe, into the Middle East and South into Africa. But, even the Romans couldn't conquer all. I think love is like the Roman Empire: it conquers a lot, but not all. Or, is love even stronger than the Roman Empire, capable of conquering any obstacle-and when an obstacle stops a relationship it just means the couple wasn't truly in love?

Cheesy? Inspiring? Whatever it means to you, the phrase "love conquers all" is kind of misleading. Just as they advise you to do in standardized tests, you should not put stock in words like "all," "always" or "every". So, under that rationale, "love conquers all" is false.

My good friend was dating a girl for a couple of years and they were actually making the long distance thing work. He was in Pennsylvania and she was in NYC. They had found a way to make their relationship fit into the grind of their lives: he had seasonal busy times because he coaches a college sport.

One day I got a call from him and he told me that everything was over. She had told him that his being unavailable during certain parts of the year had worn thin, and it was too hard to carry on the relationship long distance.

He had offered to visit her so they could work it out and she dropped all kinds of unfair breakup linessuch as:

"No, don't come here, I won't be able to say goodbye to you, it will hurt too much."

This kind of rhetoric during a breakup is unfair. You can't tell someone how hard it's going to be to see them when you are also telling them you don't want to see them anymore. My friend was in a daze, feeling numb and empty. He was even questioning his job because it played a role in him losing his girlfriend. I had forgotten that post breakup feeling, but that's it in a nutshell.

The strange thing (and I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt) is that judging from her unfair breakup words she still loves him. If she was angry at him, didn't have feelings for him anymore, or anything along those lines, she could see him with no emotional reaction.

So let's say she loves him, and he loves her. This story is proves that love does not conquer all. Shouldn't something as powerful as love be able to do overcome distance, a hectic job, "rough seas" or whatever? But in this situation, the love between two people could not conquer distance and time.

Let's say you want to believe in the power of love. If love could conquer distance and time, then this couple may not truly be in love, and this is why the relationship did not work out. But, judging from what she said at the time of the breakup, she definitely has feelings for him.

Ironically, I prescribed the very toxins that destroyed my friend's relationship to fix it:

Time - Give her time to miss you and collect her thoughts. She'll either realize she needs you back, or you will both get over it and move on. You will not feel empty forever.

Distance - Stay away from her-she's telling you she can't deal with it right now. So, give her what she asked for, and she'll have a good opinion of you either way.

Since then things have not changed between them, but it certainly forced me to question the "power" of love. Do you believe love will conquer anything, or does the real world sometimes conquer love? Do you believe that relationships that bow to obstacles (large or small) are not based on true love? Have you ever had a relationship end even though you still loved someone, and other factors forced it to end?

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