Because I don't care about sports, like, at all, my personal version of the NBA draft is "Who will be The Bachelorette (opens in new tab) or Bachelor" this year. And as Marie Claire's resident Bachelor expert—a title my colleague Katherine bestowed upon me, I didn't give it to myself, even though I'm not disagreeing—I'm usually good at guessing who's going to get the lead spot that year. Call me psychic, call me obsessed, I just like being right.
Usually the pick for The Bachelor causes some, uh, controversy. Let's not forget how the internet flipped out (opens in new tab) when Colton Underwood was named The Bachelor, myself included (opens in new tab). There was a collective "Who?" in 2017 when Arie Luyendyk, Jr. was picked as the lead, and there was a begrudging joy when Nick Viall accepted the title in 2016. But The Bachelorette has always been controversy-free, with the last controversy surrounding the pick being the odd concept of having the men decide between Kaitlyn Bristowe and Britt Nilsson for who would be the lead that season.
Okay, okay, I'll stop babbling. Your new Bachelorette is the one and only Hannah Brown, a.k.a. Hannah B., a.k.a. Hannah Beast, a.k.a, Hannah Alabama. (I told you so.)
On tonight's After The Final Rose, Colton and Cassie were together and happier than I actually ever expected to see them, but that's all in the past now, because Chris Harrison announced what we all came to find out: Hannah B. is the next Bachelorette, and according to Reality Steve (opens in new tab), she's starting filming for her journey to love in just two days, on March 14.
Brown was eliminated fifth on Underwood's season, and won the audience's heart with her bubbly and warm personality, self-deprecation, and they even managed to forgive her for giving one of the worst toasts ever. It was clear she was going to be The Bachelorette from her appearance on Women Tell All, where she told host Chris Harrison, “I thought my life was going to be this certain way. I grew up in Alabama. I was gonna marry the guy who I dated for so long right out of college, start spitting out babies. Ultimately, I just thought that was gonna be okay for me. But it is not okay for me. I want so much more, and I deserve so much more."
You do deserve more, and you're gonna get it, Hannah Alabama! Here's hoping your cousin, Hannah Montana, makes an appearance!
For more stories like this, including celebrity news, beauty and fashion advice, savvy political commentary, and fascinating features, sign up for the Marie Claire newsletter.
SUBSCRIBE HERE (opens in new tab)
Amanda Mitchell is a writer and podcaster with bylines at Marie Claire, OprahMag, Allure, Byrdie, Stylecaster, Bon Appetit, and more. Her work exists at the apex of beauty, pop culture, and absurdity. A human Funfetti cake, she watches too much television, and her favorite season is awards season. You can read more of her work at amandaelizabethmitchell.com or follow her on Instagram and Twitter @lochnessmanda.
The 7 Best Pore Strips to Bust Up Blackheads
Satisfying, for sure. But do they work?
By Samantha Holender
'Wednesday' Season 2: Everything We Know
The spooky show's return is not a question of if, but when.
By Quinci LeGardye
Why I Love My Smythson Soho Agenda
Without it, I'd be lost.
By Jenny Hollander
Sarah Hyland and Adam Devine Play 'How Well Do You Know Your Co-Star?'
The 'Modern Family' stars reunited for the 'Pitch Perfect' spinoff series.
By Brooke Knappenberger
The 78 Best Celebrity Couple Halloween Costumes of All Time
Honestly, we're impressed.
By Charlotte Chilton
Super Rare Photos of Queen Elizabeth as a Young Woman
From childhood snapshots to portraits as a young princess, beautiful and rare photos of the late Queen Elizabeth as a young woman.
By Mehera Bonner
King Charles III and Queen Consort Camilla's Relationship: A Timeline
With the passing of Queen Elizabeth II, Charles has ascended to the throne as king.
By The Editors
Who Is Next in Line for the British Throne, Explained
And yes—Harry and Archie are still in the line of succession.
By Andrea Park
Who Is Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's Fiancé Riley Roberts?
AOC's husband-to-be is an "easygoing redhead" who lives with her in D.C.
By Katherine J Igoe
22 Captivating Films About Royal Life
Once you've finished 'The Crown,' cue up one of these royally good films.
By Nicole Briese
68 Times the Kardashians Posed Fully Nude and Owned It
And we mean fully nude—as in, not a shred of clothing.
By Bianca Rodriguez