This week in petty...petty theft, Pete Doherty, and subliminal messages sent via lawnmower. Welcome to the Petty Party, which is like a newsletter of small-minded events (mostly) related to famous people.
When Taraji P. Henson Decimated an Instagram Commenter (He Started It)
Some people never learn.
When Liam Gallagher Recounted the Time He Met Pete Doherty
Nobody gives a sound bite quite like Liam Gallagher—unless it's Liam Gallagher with new music to promote. In an interview with NME, the solo artist recalled meeting Kate Moss' ex Pete Doherty with his usual color and command of language. "No, I've only met him once, but that was years ago ...It was just 'Hello, you're really tall and that.' He looked like my mic stand." How we'd all like to be remembered.
When the Internet Realized What *Really* Went Down in That Met Elevator Between Beyoncé, Jay-Z, and Solange
And that night, three excellent records were born.
And Since It Was Otherwise a Well-Behaved Week in Celeb World...This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things
Naively believing that people would do the right thing (HAHAHA), a Chinese startup lost 300,000 umbrellas in just three months. (The concept: Citi Bike but for rain shades. And without the penalty for failing to return the product, which explains the rampant theft.) Despite losing nearly all his stock, the founder will soldier on, rolling out 30 million umbrellas across China by the end of the year, the Guardian reports. I dreamed a dream, etc.
When You Hate Your Neighbor's Barney Garage and Want the World to Know It
Or at least Google Maps. In a checkmate move, a vindictive person with a lawnmower and some time on his or her hands shaved "AHOLE" with an arrow pointing to his neighbor's house, which, according to Reddit, had been renovated with a bright purple garage structure in 2009. (Other residents then petitioned the county for property tax relief, claiming the eyesore devalued their homes.) At least when the aliens do it, they make nice circles—which just goes to show humans will probably lose an intergalactic war, but at least we'll go out making some dank memes and getting in one final shot at our fellow man.
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Rachel Zegler and Halle Bailey on Dealing With Trolls as Modern-Day Disney Princesses"It’s choosing to be present and know that they’re probably just having a really hard day. And I’m putting out a movie."
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Kendall Jenner in Phoebe Philo Is Luxury with a Capital L
The sum total of her outfit is approximately six months of my rent.
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Kaia Gerber's "Off-Duty Librarian" Look Is a Win for Nerds Everywhere
Bookworms, this one is for you.
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Sarah Hyland and Adam Devine Play 'How Well Do You Know Your Co-Star?'
The 'Modern Family' stars reunited for the 'Pitch Perfect' spinoff series.
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The 78 Best Celebrity Couple Halloween Costumes of All Time
Honestly, we're impressed.
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Super Rare Photos of Queen Elizabeth as a Young Woman
From childhood snapshots to portraits as a young princess, beautiful and rare photos of the late Queen Elizabeth as a young woman.
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King Charles III and Queen Consort Camilla's Relationship: A Timeline
With the passing of Queen Elizabeth II, Charles has ascended to the throne as king.
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Who Is Next in Line for the British Throne, Explained
And yes—Harry and Archie are still in the line of succession.
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Who Is Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's Fiancé Riley Roberts?
AOC's husband-to-be is an "easygoing redhead" who lives with her in D.C.
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68 Times the Kardashians Posed Fully Nude and Owned It
And we mean fully nude—as in, not a shred of clothing.
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Who Is Jonathan Owens, Simone Biles's Fiancé and NFL Player?
"The easiest yes!" Simone wrote about the couple's engagement.
