Former Palace Press Secretary Says Staff Were "Frozen Out" When Princess Diana Didn't Get "Her Way"

"In a word, she was complicated."

Princess Diana scowling wearing a red and white dress
(Image credit: Getty Images)

Princess Diana was known for her caring personality and ability to touch millions, but she also had a more "complicated" side, as witnessed by those who knew her best. In his memoir, On Duty With The Queen, Dickie Arbiter writes about his life working as a Buckingham Palace press secretary, including his time with Prince Charles and Princess Diana. In the book, he details everything from royal tours to what it was like planning Diana's 1997 funeral—and according to Arbiter, the late royal didn't take it well when her ideas didn't go to plan.

"I had had a chance to get to know her, and in doing so began to understand the kind of person she was," Arbiter wrote, adding, "In a word, she was complicated." He went on to explain that "she was fine" when life operated as normally and "things were going her way."

However, Arbiter continued that she would give people the silent treatment if something happened that she didn't like. "If anything out of the ordinary occurred—anything that conflicted with what she wanted to do, and in her way—then you were frozen out and left to stew until she decided to invite you back into the fold," he wrote.

Princess Diana and Dickie Arbiter standing outside in coats and laughing

Dickie Arbiter (center) details his working relationship with Princess Diana in his memoir.

(Image credit: Getty Images)

Princess Diana wearing a white hat and blazer looking upset

Princess Diana is seen in 1985.

(Image credit: Getty Images)

As for these "freezes," the former palace press secretary said they "could last days or even weeks, and no-one was immune." Arbiter told a story of one such incident when he suggested that holding a reception for the England football team wasn't a good idea since they had "lost their recent game." Diana was keen to hold the event, and after breaking the news to the princess that it "won't work," he "didn't hear from Diana again for the next two weeks."

Arbiter wrote that he "eventually" realized "not to take the freezes personally," but admitted it was more difficult when he was just getting started in his role. However, the royal expert noted that despite her sometimes frosty behavior, Princess Diana was "engaging" and "fun to be with." He recalls watching Diana on her solo visit to NYC in 1989, writing how the princess "was a true professional—warm, approachable and incredibly charismatic."

"It was as if she'd been doing it all her life," he wrote of her ability to charm the public.

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Kristin Contino
Senior Royal and Celebrity Editor

Kristin Contino is Marie Claire's Senior Royal and Celebrity editor. She's been covering royalty since 2018—including major moments such as the Platinum Jubilee, Queen Elizabeth II’s death and King Charles III's coronation—and places a particular focus on the British Royal Family's style and what it means.

Prior to working at Marie Claire, she wrote about celebrity and royal fashion at Page Six Style and covered royalty from around the world as chief reporter at Royal Central. Kristin has provided expert commentary for outlets including the BBC, Sky News, US Weekly, the Today Show and many others.

Kristin is also the published author of two novels, “The Legacy of Us” and “A House Full of Windsor.” She's passionate about travel, history, horses, and learning everything she can about her favorite city in the world, London.