Who Wore the Biggest Shoulders at the 2019 Met Gala? An Investigation
An evening of sky-scraping scapulas.
When I think of camp—the theme of the 2019 Met Gala—I tend to think of three things: The films of John Waters, Celine Dion not knowing what camp is, and exaggerated shoulders. The first two are self-explanatory, but the third is interesting. Shoulder pads sort of came back in style in recent years, but in a truly campy way: It winked at the past, knowing that the look is sculpted but a little silly, and then dared to be taken seriously. What is campier than that?
And so, naturally, there were some big shoulders on the red carpet of the Met Gala this year. But whose sky-scraping scapulas risked slicing off an ear? Whose precipitous shoulder pads impaired their peripheral vision? Let's take a look at the largest and in-chargest shoulders of the 2019 Met Gala red carpet, with each look rated out of 10 for literally no reason. (We'll update throughout the night.)
Speaking of artifice and exaggeration! Kris Jenner's pillowy shoulder pads nearly distract from the realization that there's a painting of a much older version of her in someone's Calabasas attic. 10/10
Our Lord and Savior Natasha Lyonne looks like a Patrick Nagel painting come to life. 12/10
Jemima Kirke and Lena Dunham read Susan Sontag in college and don't you forget it! 10/10
No offense but if Jared Leto doesn't tongue-kiss his own severed head tonight, I'll consider the entire ball a failure. 14/10
Janet Mock looks so gorgeous that I had to be revived with smelling salts after seeing this look. 20/10
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I would watch an entire Marvel movie about Saoirse Ronan's dress. 15/10
Madelaine Petsch serving "Drew Barrymore in Ever After" ethereal shoulders. 30/10
You know how carousels always have that one horse that's like a beautiful, aqua mermaid horse? That's Florence Welch right now. 12/10
Awkwafina looking like a golden-shouldered goddess. 28/10
Other shoulder for scale on Miley Cyrus. 12/10
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Cady has been a writer and editor in Brooklyn for about 10 years. While her earlier career focused primarily on culture and music, her stories—both those she edited and those she wrote—over the last few years have tended to focus on environmentalism, reproductive rights, and feminist issues. She primarily contributes as a freelancer journalist on these subjects while pursuing her degrees. She held staff positions working in both print and online media, at Rolling Stone and Newsweek, and continued this work as a senior editor, first at Glamour until 2018, and then at Marie Claire magazine. She received her Master's in Environmental Conservation Education at New York University in 2021, and is now working toward her JF and Environmental Law Certificate at Elisabeth Haub School of Law in White Plains.
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