Jennifer Lopez Says Ben Affleck Split Did "Almost Take Me Out for Good" the Second Time
She doesn't regret any of the lessons she's learned.
Jennifer Lopez is ready to talk about her divorce from Ben Affleck.
The superstar sat down with Nikki Glaser for a conversation in Interview magazine, and she got more candid than anyone possibly expected about the much-publicized split, how it affected her, and what she learned from it.
"I was thinking about this time in my life, and I’m like, 'That’s not what I thought it was going to turn out like,'" Lopez said, referring to the separation as well as professional setbacks she suffered over the past few months. "And then I thought, 'No, this is exactly where I needed to be, to lead me to where I want to go.'"
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Asked if she regretted the relationship, or the choices she's made, because of how it turned out, Lopez said, "Not one second. That doesn’t mean it didn’t almost take me out for good. It almost did. But now, on the other side of it, I think to myself, 'F**k, that is exactly what I needed. Thank you, god. I’m sorry it took me so long. I’m sorry that you had to do this to me so many times. I should have learned it two or three times ago. I get it. You had to hit me really hard over the head with a f**king sledgehammer. You dropped the house on me. Don’t have to do it again.'"
Lopez has famously been engaged six times, once to Ojani Noa in 1997, to Cris Judd in 2000, to Marc Anthony in 2004, and to Alex Rodriguez in 2019, plus twice to Ben Affleck, in 2002 and 2022. Out of the six, Lopez ended up getting married four times, to Noa, Judd, Anthony, and Affleck the second time.
Speaking to Glaser, she said, "I finally got it!"
Though Lopez is grateful for the lessons, of course that doesn't mean it hasn't been a really difficult time for her.
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"It feels lonely, unfamiliar, scary. It feels sad. It feels desperate," she said. "But when you sit in those feelings and go, 'These things are not going to kill me,' it’s like actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself.
"Being in a relationship doesn’t define me. I can’t be looking for happiness in other people. I have to have happiness within myself. I used to say I’m a happy person, but was still looking for something for somebody else to fill, and it’s just like, 'No, I’m actually good.'"
Lopez and Affleck reconnected in 2021 after 17 years apart, and quickly got engaged then married the following year. The "Love Don't Cost a Thing" singer filed for divorce on one of their wedding anniversaries, on Aug. 20, 2024, after just two years of marriage. In the divorce filing, she cited their separation date as April 26.
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Iris Goldsztajn is a London-based journalist, editor and author. She is the morning editor at Marie Claire, and her work has appeared in the likes of British Vogue, InStyle, Cosmopolitan, Refinery29 and SELF. Iris writes about everything from celebrity news and relationship advice to the pitfalls of diet culture and the joys of exercise. She has many opinions on Harry Styles, and can typically be found eating her body weight in cheap chocolate.
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