Chrishell Stause Claims She Ignored All the "Red Flags" in Her Relationship With Justin Hartley

Doesn't sound great.

Justin Hartley and Chrishell Stause arrive at the Walt Disney Television Emmy Party on September 22, 2019 in Los Angeles, California
(Image credit: Getty/Gregg DeGuire/Stringer)

It broke my heart when I first heard Chrishell Stause say on Selling Sunset that her ex-husband Justin Hartley had "blindsided" her.

If you missed this particular moment in reality TV, Stause said at the time that Hartley had filed for divorce without warning her he was going to, and informed her via text message. Which, if that's the whole story, is far from model behavior—I think we can all agree on that.

E! News published exclusive excerpts from the TV star's upcoming memoir, Under Construction (opens in new tab), in which she details what went on behind the scenes. To be honest, it all sounds really upsetting, and I'm glad she feels she has made the right decisions for herself since her marriage ended.

"And then there was Justin, whom I met in 2013," Stause wrote. "We hit it off right away and were pretty much inseparable from day one. I fell hard and fast and thought that he hung the moon."

But their marriage didn't end up being the grow-old-together fairytale Stause had hoped for. After the surprise divorce filing, she was distraught—but she recognizes now that all this suffering was a blessing in disguise.

"The last thing I want to do is rehash old wounds but being so far away from it now I can see that what happened was a gift," she continued. "Now I understand much more clearly how I deserve to be treated. When someone is in love, it's hard to convince that person that the relationship isn't right. Even if he's waving red flags like a bullfighter to everyone around you, you're the girl striding right up to him, oblivious to any impending danger. You're too distracted and in your own world to listen."

Stause implied that Hartley's behavior was far from loving in the end. "I did fall for another love bomber not long after my divorce," she wrote, referring to Keo Motsepe, while hinting that Hartley love bombed her as well.

According to Dictionary.com, "Love bombing is the practice of showing a person excessive affection and attention as a way of manipulating them in a relationship"—so it's a pretty serious accusation.

Iris Goldsztajn is a London-based journalist, editor and author. She is the morning editor at Marie Claire, and her work has appeared in the likes of InStyle, Cosmopolitan, Bustle and Shape. Iris writes about everything from celebrity news and relationship advice to the pitfalls of diet culture and the joys of exercise. She has many opinions on Harry Styles, and can typically be found eating her body weight in cheap chocolate.