Somehow, 'The Bachelorette' Just Delivered a Master Class in Consent

"I would never press you or pressure you at all."

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(Image credit: Mark Bourdillon)

Spoilers for The Bachelorette ahead. As if we couldn't love the multi-ab Greek god Tyler Cameron any more, in this episode (Fantasy Suites!!) we got confirmation of what a gem he is. Hannah explained at her dinner date that their physical connection was so strong that she was worried about their emotional relationship. She said she's "so captivated about being around you and you holding me and kissing me—like, I just want that, I do...I have to kind of reset myself sometimes and think, 'Okay, that’s great. You know that [the physical aspect is] there. But like, it has to be more.'" She concluded by saying she doesn't want to do an overnight with him, so that they can talk more.

Tyler responded thoughtfully. Despite the Fantasy Suite's implications, he said, "I just want to be with you." He added: "I would never press you or pressure you at all," and "I would love to spend more time with you and just be us." It was exactly what a woman could hope to hear from another person when she's approaching the notion of sex and wants to be reassured.

This was the initial scene, but it didn't capture Tyler's brilliant response:

So here's a look at Tyler's full response:

And as a survivor, I felt that his words spoke to me. Beyond its resonance in a show that has a complicated relationship with sex, and in which fans have shamed Hannah this season for her decisions regarding sex, it's a model for whatever respectful and sexy relationships can look like. This is particularly surprising to see on a show like The Bachelor, which has had a very difficult relationship with consent in past seasons.

Hannah was so thrilled that she said Tyler was the most respectful man she's ever dated, ever. When they left each other, she openly wept—it's a really good sign for his future.

And here's the transcript of his full speech:

Hannah spoke about the scene in her live-tweeting of the episode:

And fans were absolutely into it:

Obviously, people were also floored she didn't hook up with him—but it gave him the ability to prove himself, so I thought it was perfect. Especially considering what we're getting later in the episode in the form of Jed (defensive about Luke, pressuring her unnecessarily), and Luke (ugh, where to even begin, but basically does the exact opposite when faced with the prospect of sex with Hannah), this is exactly what we needed in this episode. Tyler's beauty doesn't just extend to his abs—he sounds like a decent, genuine person.

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(Image credit: The Bachelorette)
Katherine J. Igoe
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Katherine’s a contributing syndications editor at Marie Claire who covers fashion, culture, and lifestyle. In her role, she writes stories that are syndicated by MSN and other outlets. She’s been a full-time freelancer for over a decade and has had roles with Cosmopolitan (where she covered lifestyle, culture, and fashion SEO content) and Bustle (where she was their movies and culture writer). She has bylines in New York TimesParentsInStyle, Refinery29, and elsewhere. Her work has also been syndicated by ELLEHarper’s BazaarSeventeenGood Housekeeping, and Women’s Health, among others. In addition to her stories reaching millions of readers, content she's written and edited has qualified for a Bell Ringer Award and received a Communicator Award. 

Katherine has a BA in English and art history from the University of Notre Dame and an MA in art business from the Sotheby's Institute of Art (with a focus on marketing/communications). She covers a wide breadth of topics: she's written about how to find the very best petite jeanshow sustainable travel has found its footing on Instagram, and what it's like to be a professional advice-giver in the modern world. Her personal essays have run the gamut from learning to dress as a queer woman to navigating food allergies as a mom. She also has deep knowledge of SEO/EATT, affiliate revenue, commerce, and social media; she regularly edits the work of other writers. She speaks at writing-related events and podcasts about freelancing and journalism, mentors students and other new writers, and consults on coursework. Currently, Katherine lives in Boston with her husband and two kids, and you can follow her on Instagram. If you're wondering about her last name, it’s “I go to dinner,” not “Her huge ego,” but she responds to both.