Why Madonna's Divorce Crushes Us

Most Popular

Call me delusional, but despite the endless rumors on TMZ and Perez about custody, prenups, and settlements, I still can't believe she's getting divorced from Guy Richie. The most upsetting part, though, is that most people are assuming it was inevitable, all her fault, or both.

I don't for a minute imagine she was an easy person to be partnered with. Stories swirled that she spent four hours a day at the gym and didn't have sex with her husband for over a year (this is "Erotic, erotic, put your hands all over my body" Madonna we're talking about). I read gossip items about her pushing Kabbalah on him, railroading him into adopting, and being a self-absorbed workaholic. But that was Madonna just being Madonna. Presumably he knew that going in; just by listening to the lyrics of "Holiday," he'd have known the girl can't take a day off. I see Madonna, and lots of other alpha-women, as being stuck in a Catch-22: If after the wedding, she'd quit work and traded her bodysuits and bad-girl attitude for mom jeans or, worse, gone all meek and Stepford, we'd say Richie was sold a bill of goods. On the other hand, when she kept being the self-absorbed workaholic she's always been, she gets blamed for ruining her marriage.

Advertisement - Continue Reading Below

Sure, Madonna is exceedingly type A, the ultimate ball-busting alpha woman. But I haven't heard anyone question Richie's role, how maybe he couldn't handle her never-ending string of successes while his once-ascending career sputtered out a series of creative and commercial flops (she bounced back from Swept Away; him, not so much).

Well, why should a stranger's marriage mean so much to me? In 2000, when they wed in a fairy-tale-perfect castle in the Scottish Highlands, it proved that the belief about men being intimidated by powerful women was an antiquated load of bull. A successful husband, an adorable family, a killer body, a substantial bank account, and a rockin' career? Madonna's happily ever after assured me a modern woman could have it all. Don't get me wrong — I don't think Madge and I are identical bosom buddies. But if controlling overachiever Madonna, the ultimate ball-busting alpha woman, could find a cool, supportive guy to spend her life with, couldn't we all?

Which is why I was crushed when their marriage finally split. None of us will really ever know exactly why they divorced — maybe she did step out with A-Rod. But the point is that everyone thought it was inevitable. "How could a woman like that pull this off?" was the sentiment. What I'm left wondering now is ... can't we?

Celebrity
Share
Prepare the Tissues: We Have Your Exclusive First Look at the New 'Me Before You' Trailer
And it's a *doozy*. ​
Celebrity
Share
20 Celebrities on Not Wanting Kids
No, being a parent isn't something everyone wants to be.​
Celebrity
Share
The Investigation of Prince's Death Has Taken a Grim Turn
​​The DEA is now involved.​
Celebrity
Share
12 Celebrities You Never Knew Were Adopted
​Yes, including Marilyn Monroe.
Celebrity
Share
Watch Gisele Bündchen Teach Jimmy Fallon How to Walk the Runway
The supermodel passes her torch to the late night host.
Celebrity
Share
Luckiest Fans Alive Slay "Single Ladies" Choreography with Beyoncé
These Beyhive members were PREPARED.​
Celebrity
Share
Caitlyn Jenner Uses Ladies' Room at Trump Tower, Slams Ted Cruz in the Process
​Zing!​​
Celebrity
Share
Only Beyoncé Could Both Heighten and De-Escalate the Becky Drama with the Start of Her 'Formation' Tour
​​But whatever—the clothes are sick.​
Celebrity
Share
Thing You Didn't Know: Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Were Separated a Year Before They Announced It
​"When we said we're going to put the children first, we meant it."​
Celebrity
Share
We Don't Know What to Believe About this Relationship Anymore: Miley Cyrus Is Reportedly Planning Her Wedding
Celebrity news whiplash.​​