Spoiler alert for the premiere of The Bachelorette.
Well, we've already met the most, uh, colorful man among the whole bunch of Hannah Brown's bachelors on this season of The Bachelorette: Joe "The Box King" Barsano. He literally jumped out of a box for Hannah and proclaimed himself the "box king." But what IS a box king, exactly?
So apparently he's a "representative at his family’s cardboard box manufacturing company." In Joe's intro, he explained that he has a box for everyone's particular needs (with video of him standing atop said boxes, natch). There was even a d*ck in a box joke! Per his bio, "When he's not killing it in the family cardboard box business, he enjoys going to Vegas and club-hopping." He has the MOST personality, you guys.
Then there was his crazy meeting with Hannah. There was a huge box loaded in. Hannah looked a bit scared, TBH. The other bachelors were dumbfounded, crowding around the window and wondering what in the world was going on. Then Joe literally jumped out, screaming, "Hannah, this package isn't complete without you!"
He went on, saying "I can't wait to get to know you," and "You check all my boxes."
And poor Chris Harrison had to clean up after the mess, hilariously.
Later, in a one on one with Hannah, Joe told her, "I can make any size of box" and there were some box size jokes as well, sooooo... subtle.
Worth noting: Demi, who'd kind of my spirit animal in this whole process, did not like him. And also worth noting: He did not get even a first rose from Hannah and told her he was really sad (no package for Hannah!), soooo The Box King will have to remain the king of fans' hearts alone.
For more stories like this, including celebrity news, beauty and fashion advice, savvy political commentary, and fascinating features, sign up for the Marie Claire newsletter.
RELATED STORIES
-
Why Prince William's Exes Attended His Wedding to Kate MiddletonThe exes were invited "due to a more peculiar upper class British tradition."
-
Why Prince William "Stepped in" for King Charles at the Pope's FuneralThe seating plan was described as a "master plan" of "big egos."
-
A Vintage Fendi Baguette Is Bella Hadid's Plus-OneThe model paired her skintight capri jumpsuit with pointed-toe heels.
-
Meet 'Selling the City' Star Jordyn Taylor Braff: What to Know About Her Career Trajectory and Dating HistoryShe even had a surprising career path before joining Douglas Elliman.
-
Are Joan Vassos and Chock Chapple Still Together After 'The Golden Bachelorette' Finale? Here's What to KnowThe Bachelor Nation lovebirds have an exciting future planned.
-
32 Celebrity Podcasts Worth Listening ToGrab some headphones and tune in.
-
What Happened on 'The Bachelorette' Finale: Here's What to Know About How Jenn Tran's Season EndedThe drama between Jenn, Devin, and Maria has made Bachelor Nation furious... at the producers.
-
The 30 Celebrity Memoirs That Are Actually Worth ReadingBritney Spears, Demi Moore, Jessica Simpson, and more drop some serious bombshells in these pages.
-
How Victoria Justice Learned to Use Her Voice on the Set of 'Victorious'The former Nickelodeon star recalls what it was like to speak up to adults on set as a child.
-
Paul Mescal and Daisy Edgar-Jones Tease an Announcement: "We've Got Some News to Share"The former 'Normal People' costars and IRL best friends seem to have a new project in the works.
-
The Woman Who Inspired Martha in 'Baby Reindeer' Calls the Series "a Work of Fiction" In a YouTube InterviewA woman has come forward as the alleged inspiration behind Martha in the hit Netflix series.
