You're walking that delightfully fine line between fantasy and reality. You seem to know what you want, though as you consider it and focus your ideas and make the possibility real, you may be feeling a little edgy. I suggest reassuring yourself with the idea that everything you do with passion is contributing to your healing process. I know that most notions of healing include the smell of rubbing alcohol, or perhaps aromatherapy, in a treatment room. You can take a wider view of your life and of your growth process. You can take a wider view of your devotional practice. You were born to celebrate the beauty of life. Remember this, from the poetry of the goddess: "all acts of love and pleasure are my rituals. And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honor and humility, mirth and reverence within you."
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