Last night, Taylor Swift and Karlie Kloss swanned into the Oscar de la Renta show and settled into their front-row seats, from where they smiled serenely and plotted to take over the world together. (Only half-joking.) In honor of their chic, conspiratorial friendship, we've collected seven photos of them with captions provided by our lip-readers—that is, before Kaylor bought them out and set them on Harry Styles.
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"And then—DON'T LOOK AT ME, KAR—while Olivia Benson's distracting the security guard, we sneak in and grab all the cat-shaped coin purses. And we only leave a 50 percent tip for their trouble! Mwahahahahahahaha!"
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Lorde: "Guys. I know I said we should abolish round-toe spectator pumps when we become Joint Empresses of the Universe, but you don't have to look at me like that. It was just an idea!" Kaylor: *judging and shunning* *crosses Lorde's name off the Famous-Girl Illuminati charter*
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"I didn't write a hand-painted thank-you note to my assistant yesterday for getting me Starbucks. I feel like Dirty Harry."
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"Excuse me. Could you do something about that? I'm trying to discuss the military-industrial complex here with my friend, and there's a guy outside with a camera. Ooooh, I know! Let's send out some cookies!"
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Tay-Tay, dictating her autobiography: "July, 14, 2014. As I was going to get almond-crusted French toast with my second-in-command, it dawned on me that Kar-Kar might someday usurp me. I text Mar-Mar [editor's note: that's Martha Hunt] to increase surveillance on her."
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"OK. So 10 p.m. under the arch in Washington Square Park. I'll bring the cable ties and knitting needles. Leave your structured bag at home this time, damn it!"
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"God, Kar. Do you think Walter White celebrates this early? Keep walking, keep walking, don't look back—I SAID DON'T LOOK BACK." *explosion* *Taylor puts her sunglasses on*
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