Kylie Jenner Is Coming For Your Liquor, Furniture, Wine, and Kitchen

With 16 new trademarks, NOTHING IS SAFE.

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Not content with already controlling the entire contents of your makeup bag with Kylie Cosmetics, and refining the pores on your actual facial surface with Kylie Skin, Kylie Jenner is now coming for the rest of your life. The billionaire businesswoman is about to hit you where it hurts, taking over everything that you hold true with a grand total of 16 new trademark applications that will fully cement her status as Queen of Taking All Your Money.

Thanks to the sneak-peek world of trademark applications, Kardashian fans already have their suspicions about the next venture on Kylie’s list. Back in May, the reality star applied for the use of “Kylie Baby” and “Kylie Baby by Kylie Jenner”, so it’s fair to assume that she’ll soon control all of the smallest humans in various ways.

But just when you thought that Kylie couldn’t get any closer to your heart than your children… She’s coming for your wine. And your liquor. And your food.

TMZ reports (via the United States Patent and Trademark Office) that Kylie has set her sights on a huge selection of new areas for her business to spread its wings. Amongst the applications for trademarks to use her first and full name is “spirits, liquor, wine, alcohol cocktail mixes, prepared wine cocktails, non-alcoholic cocktail bases, energy sports drinks, smoothies, beers”. Interestingly, the application also extends to “restaurants, bars and cocktail lounges”, so you just know that Kylie Cocktails is coming soon to Las Vegas.

As well as booze, 21-year-old Kylie is also applying to use her lucrative name across the lifestyle board, with potential future KJ products including “furniture, home accessories; kitchenware; cookware; dining ware; food and drink products.” Intriguing...

So, look forward to your Friday evenings sipping on a refreshing glass of Kylie Wine (her preferred bottle is only $22, btw), while you Kylie Cook up a little Kylie Risotto on your Kylie Oven, while wearing a Kylie Apron in your Kylie Kitchen.

It’s like the ultimate Barbie dream you had when you were little come to life, and I'm not sure whether to be afraid or excited.

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Lucy Wood

Lucy Wood spends most of her time writing about celebrity news, reading books, and waiting for the glorious day that she have enough millions for a pet sloth. She also has a YouTube channel on the go where she pretends to know things about fashion and life advice.