The 24 Best Sex Toys For Partner Play

If you thought toys were just for me-time, think again.

a collage of sex toys
(Image credit: Brittany Holloway-Brown)

We often think of sex toys in terms of solo masturbation, but if you're not incorporating one of the best sex toys into your sexual repertoire with a partner, you could be missing out on a world of fun. 

"Sex toys can enhance all sexual relationships―with yourself and with a partner, confirms Dr. Jess O'Reilly, sexologist and relationship expert at sex toy site Lovehoney (opens in new tab). "The mere presence of a sex toy often leads to new conversations about everything from desires and fantasies to boundaries and hesitations." And, as we all know, honesty and vulnerability enhances all relationships.

Sex toys can also bring a bit of spiciness to an otherwise bland sexual routine. If you're in a long-term relationship or if you're just looking to learn more about what makes you and your partner feel good, toys serve as an excellent (not to mention fun) teacher. "The novelty of a toy can also heighten passion, as it can offer a simple reminder to break your routine and try something new," Dr. O'Reilly agrees. 

Still, whether you've never used a sex toy with a partner or just need to expand your inventory, it can be difficult to know where to begin—there are a lot of sex toys for couples out there. For that reason, we've rounded up some of the very best sex toys to bring to bed with your partner for your deepest connection yet.

How to Bring Up Sex Toys With Your Partner

Many people become nervous or even defensive when it comes time to talk with a partner about bringing toys into the bedroom, but this initial conversation (or conversations) doesn't have to be so anxiety-inducing, so long as each partner is honest, empathetic, and open to listening. 

"When broaching the topic of introducing toys with your partner, it’s important to talk about what and how you are feeling," says Ashton Egner (opens in new tab), communications manager at sex toy brand Kiiroo. "The key for any couple is communication. If you don’t talk about your sexual wants, needs, and desires your partner will never know that you want to incorporate toys into your sexual relationship." 

Furthermore, it's important to be introspective about why you want to use sex toys during partner play. "Explaining why you think introducing toys into your relationship will ignite things in the bedroom will provide your partner with a better understanding of your desires."

Still nervous about bringing the topic up? Consider doing a bit of research before you put your thoughts and feelings out in the open. "Educating yourself with articles or podcasts from other people who have been through the same situation will help you go into the conversation with a background on why you may be feeling the way you do―decreasing the chances of your partner feeling negatively toward your request," Egner affirms. 

How to Get Started

So you've done your thinking, performed your research, and had a wonderfully open conversation with your partner, which begs the question: What now? 

"Once you’ve established what exactly you’re craving with your partner, the next step is to choose the type of toy that will please one or both of you," Egner suggests. "The first place to start is with something simple such as a vibrating toy, and if you like the sensation, start to look at the different types of toys available on the market today. We all have different bodies, and we all have different sensations that tease and please us. Once you are able to communicate that desire, it will be easier to start experimenting from there."

For Clitoral Stimulation

If you have a clitoris, you're no stranger to the intense sensations that touching it can produce. It is, after all, the only human organ built first and foremost for pleasure! It's no wonder, then, why so stimulators and even penetrative toys are made with the clitoris in mind. 

The most popular of these clitoris-focused toys are vibrators, but remember that not all vibrations are alike, and not all toys stimulate the clitoris in the same way! Egner encourages couples to explore what makes them feel best, both in terms of vibration type and where they like to be touched, before finally settling on a toy. "Once a couple has figured out if vibrations are something they enjoy, then they can start to explore the more premium sex toys that can be used during foreplay, or while being intimate," she says. "The possibilities are endless, however, it’s important to figure out what is best for you, your partner, and your relationship."

And, as you'll see from some of the options below, when it comes to types of toys, the possibilities are endless.

For Penis Play

Sex toy articles tend to focus on vibrators and clitoral stimulation, but there are toys that stimulate penises, too! Many provide simultaneous stimulation to the clitoris, but, regardless, it can be just as much fun to watch your partner have a good time as it is to have a good time yourself. 

For Strap-On Fun

Strap-ons can be used in a myriad of situations, but are especially popular among queer women as well as men who enjoy anal stimulation (many men, of all sexual orientations, do!). And we have good news: If you have a vagina and are interested in a strap-on option that pleases both you and your partner simultaneously, there are a number of products out there for you and your person to explore to your heart's content.

Remote-Controlled Toys

In a long-distance relationship, or just looking for more sexy reminders of your partner when you two are apart? "Using remote-controlled sex toys is a great opportunity to explore eroticism throughout the day, regardless of your location," says Dr. O'Reilly. "They offer novel sensations and inspire playfulness which in turn creates stronger relationships because it improves openness and exploration."

If you're new to remote-controlled toys, O'Reilly suggests exploring control dynamics. "Especially for those accustomed to routine, remote-controlled sex toys are a great opportunity to experiment with new roles...Take turns teasing each other and exploring new levels of anticipation." She also suggests getting creative with time. "Remote-controlled toys really allow you to play with the building anticipation and prolong your partnered experience."

For Nipple Play

There are countless people who can attest to the joys of sexual stimulation to the nipples, and this anecdotal evidence has been validated in a number of studies. In a particular 2011 piece by researchers at Rutgers University, researchers found that, in a sexual context, nipple stimulation sends sensory signals to the same part of the brain that processes stimulation to the clitoris, vagina, and cervix.

If you already love the feeling of your partner touching your nipples (or vice versa), check out some of these nipple-focused toys that can bring your exploration to the next level.

For The Adventurous

If you want to get a little kinky or think outside the box with a partner, you're not alone! And Dr. O'Reilly stresses the importance of divulging your fantasies to a partner, especially if your relationship with that person is also emotionally intimate. "These vulnerable conversations have the potential to deepen intimacy and connection," she tells us. As long as there's consent all around, there's nothing wrong with trying something new!

For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.