Hugh Hefner's 83rd birthday (April 9); Victoria Beckham's 35th (April 17).
One wears Old Spice; the other is old Spice.

Diamond dust in our beauty products, like Sally Hansen's lip gloss and American Beauty's antiaging cream.
Boyfriends, please note: These are not a stand-in for the 2-carat ring we're waiting for.

High-end designers Shipley & Halmos peddle their hipster-prep threads at affordable Uniqlo.
It's like a government bailout for your wardrobe.

Our tax refund!
We'll be splurging on a venti latte and an apple fritter.

The new refillable, stainless-steel Sharpie Premium.
A.k.a. the Cadillac of Sharpies.

The Swarovski Crystallized Store and Lounge in New York City, featuring design-your-own jewelry.
Build-a-Bear for grown-ups!

Depeche Mode's Sounds of the Universe (April 21).
Listen to it in your DeLorean while solving a Rubik's Cube.

The 44th Academy of Country Music Awards (April 5).
Dwight Yoakam wins for tightest Wranglers.

April Fools' Day (April 1).
Consider those layoff rumors before putting fake dog doo on your boss's chair.

Hand-painted scarves from Leigh & Luca, with 50 percent of proceeds going toward the climate crisis.
And if they don't solve the crisis, you still get a cute scarf. Win-win.

Earth Day (April 22).
Recycle an ex.

Tie-dyed lips by genius makeup artist Pat McGrath.
Not as painful as it sounds.

What Do You Think?