Meeting Someone New at a Party: The Revised Script

"But, like, which meme is the dankest?"

The Weeknd & Kate Hudson
(Image credit: Getty)

The cleverest trick for making small talk bearable is not really participating it—ask your torturer about himself, and you won't have to speak again for ages, because most people don't understand the courtesy of "How about you?" However, if you find yourself in the mood to #disrupt, here are five twists on the standard cocktail-party pleasantries.

Bold. Elegant. Just controversial enough to lead into a spirited debate about animal biology and the similar conundrum involving a dog and trousers (opens in new tab).

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Contemplative. Wryly humorous. Existential. Opens the door for your partner in conversation to unload his or her own millennial crises.

Borneo could be fun. Plus then you would get to know the other person's thoughts on gentrification, and doesn't everybody have Deep Musings on that?

So cool. (You know what memes are.) So dangerous. (You could start, like, a meme duel, and you know what happened to the last guy who got himself in a meme duel.)

And that's how it's done. #mostinterestingguestintheworld

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Chelsea Peng
Assistant Editor

Chelsea Peng is a writer and editor who was formerly the assistant editor at MarieClaire.com. She's also worked for The Strategist and Refinery29, and is a graduate of Northwestern University. On her tombstone, she would like a GIF of herself that's better than the one that already exists on the Internet and a free fro-yo machine. Besides frozen dairy products, she's into pirates, carbs, Balzac, and snacking so hard she has to go lie down.