Pet Fashion Week in New York (August 22--23). Total bitchfest.
The return of Project Runway (August 20). Dixie-cup dresses! Seat-belt jackets! Oh, how we missed you, Runway.
Hermès Eau De Pamplemousse Rose. Because nothing smells better than a fresh summer pamplemousse.
The 40th anniversary of Woodstock (August 15-17). Put on your DVF maxi dress, smoke some medical marijuana, and catch the Broadway revival of Hair.
The emerald-green 4-by-9- inch Sony VAIO notebook with new Windows 7 upgrade. Make your MacBook Air feel old and fat.
Summer fruit in season! Make a peach cobbler. OK, buy one then.
Hawaii celebrating 50 years of statehood (August 21). Cue up the Don Ho and get lei'd.
The Sartorialist, the fashion voyeur's bible, photographed by Scott Schuman. Consult it the next time you're thinking of leaving the house in your velour tracksuit.
International Left-Handers' Day (August 13). Buy lefty scissors for someone you love.
Bing Bang designer Anna Sheffield's new jewelry line for Target. Your trendy friend and your CPA will approve.
State-fair fun! Meet us at the 850-pound watermelon.
Congress on vacation for the month. They've earned it! Wait, no, they haven't.