The Alternate Ending to Titanic Is Laughably Bad

"That really sucks, lady!"
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Don't get your hopes up: Rose still couldn't scoot over just enough for Jack to have lived too.

Instead, in this alternate ending to Titanic James Cameron shot and mercifully stowed away, Gloria Stuart delivers an overlong monologue about life being priceless and making each day count, yadda yadda, before over-the-shoulder-tossing the Heart of the Ocean back where it belongs.

But should the synth-y soundtrack and dialogue put you off, know the squeak made the cut and that Bill Paxton as the treasure hunter dude has a satisfactory maniacal laugh.

Watch the hilariously terrible video below, and thank your lucky stars Cameron had the good sense to hide it away as a bonus feature on the DVD.

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