Convinced I can hack the full-body overhaul, I check into the Meridian spa for a round of cupping. Chinese women get cupped for a variety of reasons to detoxify, to boost metabolism, to tackle a pesky muffin top. The practitioner moves fast, lighting an alcohol-soaked cotton ball on fire, waving it around inside a small glass jar with tongs and applying the jar immediately to my back. As the jar cools,it sucks my skin up into unsightly purple mountains. The darker the mounds, the more toxins are in your body. Mine look like hickeys on steroids, and the bruises last for a week. But I'm proud of my new souvenirs. My muscles ache in that best-workout-ever way, and my lungs are wide open. When I get dressed two hours later, I swear my pants are bigger. Cupping just might be my new alternative to crunches.