7 Things Your Sex Dreams Really Mean

They can tell you a lot about your life.

Woman on bed
(Image credit: Getty Images)

Ever wake up in the A.M. confused about the crazy sex (opens in new tab) dream you just had? Before you jump to conclusions—like it's a sign that you should get a divorce (opens in new tab) or your hubby is texting another woman (opens in new tab)—there's something Ian Wallace (opens in new tab), psychologist, dream expert, and author of The Complete A To Z Dictionary Of Dreams: Be Your Own Dream Expert (opens in new tab)thinks you should know: Your sex dreams have absolutely nothing to do with, well, having sex at all. Here's what they really mean: 

1. Cheating on your husband.

A dream like this often points to an underlying lack of trust, but not in your marriage (opens in new tab). "It means that the dreamer is losing faith in their own attractiveness and is experiencing something in their waking life that is making them feel less confident (opens in new tab) and sure of themselves," says Wallace. Whether you got shot down after presenting a new idea at work, or that super-fit, has-it-all mom (opens in new tab) is suddenly making you question everything, Wallace says it's a sign you're seeking too much approval from those around you.

2. Having gay sex—if you're straight—or straight sex—if you're gay.

"You're becoming very comfortable with your body (opens in new tab) and tolerant about your beliefs, morals, and values as a person." But that's not all. Wallace says it also could be a reflection of your adventurous side as a parent, spouse, and employee.

3. Sex with a person who has no face.

"The face symbolizes identity, so if the person you're having sex with (opens in new tab) has no face, it means there's something you're constantly being challenged by in your life that you haven't discovered yet," says Wallace. In other words, it's a call to action to look more closely at what could potentially be holding you back so you can fix it, asap. 

4. Best-friend sex.

It might seem weird, but Wallace says fantasies like these come and go when there's a personality trait you really admire that your best friend has. See? No major problems here. Unless of course your situation is eerily similar to Joey and Rachel's.

5. Experiencing an actual orgasm.

If it feels like you're having an orgasm (opens in new tab), it could actually be because you're getting close to experiencing one physically, according to studies (opens in new tab). It's not just men who get extra excited (opens in new tab) while catching z's. Experts say (opens in new tab) women, too, go through bodily changes—i.e. increase in vaginal lubrication, enlarged clitoris—during the REM stage (opens in new tab) of sleep that can lead to arousal down there. And if your sex dream (opens in new tab) happens to coincide with the time that you're experiencing REM, you're really in for a treat.

6. Sex with a co-worker you can't stand. 

In short, you're super jealous (opens in new tab) of a work-related talent or skill that this person is good at and are frustrated that they're excelling at it and you aren't, says Wallace. 

7. Sex with Bradley Cooper.

Or Becks (opens in new tab). Or Leo circa 1997. Besides the possibility that you might just be dreaming out a life-long fantasy of having sex with a hot celeb (opens in new tab), Wallace says these kinds of dreams signal that you—like most celebrities—are really good at something in your life and have the ability to gain even more power from it. Lucky you...and Bradley.

Kayla Keegan
Kayla Keegan

Kayla Keegan covers all things in the entertainment, pop culture and celebrity space for Good Housekeeping. She is the go-to TV consultant for the brand when it comes to shows like The Masked SingerThis Is Us, and America's Got Talent. Prior to joining the team, she worked at House BeautifulRedbookCosmopolitan and Seventeen.